I've put the blog on an indefinite Hiatus (again). Sorry, I don't have enough time to blog anymore. But I will be back.... sometime. So please keep checking, and do not remove my blog from your bookmark! Later, homies!

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Tuesday, October 31, 2006
I was browsing Technorati a bit, and found a lot of posts about "Amalah", "Sweetney" and "Violent Acres". I could figure out there was a relation between these "things" or "stuff" or whatever they are. I'm feeling real lazy today (the way I feel almost every other day), so I'm not really interested in doing a bit of research. Can anyone please explain what the hell it is about? I will give you a cookie if you do ;)

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The Blue Billion S(t)inks

Sunday, October 29, 2006
The crunch match. The true test of character. The moment of truth. And the truth is, India was not upto it. India were comprehensively beaten in the virtual quarter-final of the Champions Trophy 2006 against Australia. The Blue Billion, instead of rising, sunk. And predictably, captain Rahul Dravid went, "I think we were 25-30 runs short in the end." That is what you say every single time! Think of another excuse for the upcoming series against South Africa and then the World Cup!

Seriously though, I think all the unnecessary hype is to blame, especially the one created by Pepsi. The Blue Billion hype was just too much. Morons who knew nothing about cricket joined in, semi-intelligent cricket fans started talking like experts, the expectations for the Indian team to win went soaring, the pressure got to them and they crumbled like a cookie.

For those of you who don't know about the Blue Billion hype, I'll explain it to you real quick. Pepsi roped in a few celebrities before this cricket tournament kicked off. There were stupid commercials on TV, where these celebs ask every Indian to cheer the team (The color of the Indian cricket team outfit = blue. Indian population = one billion. One billion people wearing the team color = support, and eventually "Blue Billion". Get it?). And they had this "One in a billion" competition where people (morons) were asked "What would be the craziest thing you'd do for the Indian team?" and they'd go "I'll keep doing the spinning dance till the team wins!", "I'll invite the whole team over to lunch!", "I'll wear a blue wig and Indian team colors and cheer for them! Gooooo team!!!!", "I make super spicy snacks. I'll give it to the team and they'll be charged up on the field!" etc. See, Pepsi knew there are plenty of semi-intelligent "fans" out there, and capitalized on that. Do these morons even know that Pepsi doesn't give a shit about Indian cricket? Do they even realize all this blue billion hype was created only to recover lost ground by the cola giant, because of the pesticide controversy? Why is there plenty of morons in the country? When will sanity prevail? So many questions, I don't think I'll have the answers any sooner.

But of course, in the end, the team had to perform. But didn't. Lost. Got knocked out of the tournament. As simple as that. It was one of the worst bowling performances I've ever seen. All the unnecessary hype over Munaf Patel being a great strike bowler got to him. Now look what happened. He gave away too many runs and bowled too many bad deliveries. Asking Pathan to be an all rounder already is too much, and it has taken its toll in his bowling. There are so many questions to be answered before the team leaves for the South African tour. What happened to the "superb batting form" of Yuvraj Singh all of a sudden? Suresh Raina looked like he was playing to retain his place in the team. He wasn't putting the bad deliveries to the boundary. All the hype over M.S Dhoni being a great hitter is bullshit. What happened to his "immense batting talent" today, when it was needed the most? Why couldn't Harbhajan Singh, the "greatest bowler in the Indian team" right now, deliver when it was needed? And R.P Singh, what the fuck was he doing in the team in the first place? All the so called "talent" and "form" popped like cherry and the whole team was fucked over in the tournament. I bet everyone in the team has made their money and are looking to retire early in life. Commercialization of sport must be stopped. Now. Or all the excitement in it will be lost.

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Where is Austin Powers???

Saturday, October 28, 2006
... 'cause these MF's need to be stopped. Yeah baby, yeah!

Osama Mini Bin

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Firefox 2.0

Friday, October 27, 2006
Finally the wait is over. And I finally got the time to download the much awaited version of the browser. Looks neat. The only change I was able to notice immediately were the icons and a "close" button in every tab. The "go" button and the search area have had a makeover too. I have heard criticisms on Firefox 2.0's GUI, but it seems alright to me. It's actually better than the previous versions, in my opinion. The default theme is by far the best of all the Firefox versions.

I'm glad that the in-page search finally returns matches found in forms and text areas (or text boxes). Well, its about time! This was one area where Internet Explorer was owned Firefox. It was a big headache for me previously, when I had to find word(s) in the typing area of Blogger, to edit sentences. Finally, I can find the words easily.

In built spell checker! That is a great feature, though I don't make typos :P. In fact, I came to realize I'm a good and relatively fast typer when spell check didn't return me a lot of errors :D. Added to this, it also has identity theft protection. Plus an enhanced Web Feed support. If users don't want to save a live bookmark to their bookmarks folder, they can instead choose to save it to online services, such as Bloglines, My Yahoo!, or Google Reader, or with any desktop application.

The only thing that probably bothers Firefox addicts (like me) is the way tabbed browsing works. A close button has now been added to every tab, instead of just one on the top right. Also, it seems Firefox uses lesser memory now. Atleast that is how it appeared to me. The default theme did guzzle up a bit more memory than the one in the previous version, but the Mostly Crystal theme took a lot less memory than it did in the previous version. Overall, Firefox 2.0 owns every other browser out there!

Firefox 2

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Awesome Idea

Tuesday, October 24, 2006
I've got a great idea that might solve the cross-border terrorism of Pakistan forever. There are one billion of us in the country, see? We all piss in the direction of Pakistan at the same time, see? That would flood Pakistan and drown them towelheads for good.

After that, we target China ;). Fucking slant eyed communist midgets.

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Internet Explorer 7

Monday, October 23, 2006
Finally, its here. I tried the latest version of Inturdnet Expl... I mean, Internet Explorer. Looks okay. The biggest change, in my opinion, is the user interface. It didn't load broken pages like the beta (yet...). And security wise, it is a big step forward from the previous versions, I think. The much talked about ActiveX handling by IE has changed dramatically. Still, I wouldn't say it cannot be exploited with scriptlets. IE 7 still doesn't have perfect standards support, but it is much better than previous versions of the browser.

I'm glad it supports CSS and JavaScript better than the previous versions. That means I probably won't be getting pissed off (often, atleast) when my Blogger template looks fucked up in IE. It has got a RSS feed discovery, quick zoom, custom search settings for integrated search bar... almost every feature its competitor browsers already have. This should have lessened the gap between IE and its competitors, but it still has a long way to go to catch up, one feels. I even heard IE is taking the Firefox path, supporting add-ons made by third party developers (ieaddons.com). Hmm, this is going to be interesting.

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What do all Rockstar produced games have in common, other than sex and violence? You guessed it, controversy. Early this week, Rockstar games released a game, Bully, and controversy has arised even before it has hit the United States. Some moron lawyer (Jack Thompson) from Florida filed a case, wanting the game to be banned. The funny this is, he hasn't even played a bit of the game, but claims that it could lead to student violence. Uh huh. Sounds like an out-of-job lawyer, looking to earn some easy money by suing people. The bastard.

"The premise of Bully is that it is sometimes acceptable to deal with bullying by becoming the ultimate bully," Thompson wrote in his complaint. "This was the dynamic at Columbine. It has been the dynamic in other tragic instances of school violence."

However, sanity prevailed and the judge gave Jack Thompson the middle finger. After he watched someone play it, Florida Judge Ronald Friedman concluded: "There's a lot of violence. A whole lot. (But) less than we see on television every night." Tough luck, Jack Thompson. You gotta wait till Rockstar releases the next game in the Grand Theft Auto series to try your luck again.

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Recently I came to know that a famous porn star, Mary Carey is running for Governor of California. This chick has acted in movies titled "Boobsville Sorority Girls", "Cheerleader School etc. LMFAO! Claims the wannabe Governor turned porn star, "More people know that I am running for governor than (know of) Arnold (Schwarzenegger)'s Democratic challenger. Our polling results have shown my name to be more recognizable than any other candidate in the race." Indeed. You're a porn star!

And I thought our politics was fucked up...

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One for Paris Hilton

Saturday, October 21, 2006
It's been a while since I bashed the heiress, Paris Hilton. She hasn't been upto anything stupid recently (looks like she came across my blog, saw my bashing and committed suicide?). So here's one to Paris. I was searching for her pics, hoping to run into some funny result. I did. Look what I found.

Oops, she spelt "YOU'RE" wrong!

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Humor in Depression

Friday, October 20, 2006
I have a mild bipolar disorder (...I think), so I was like "I can't do anything right. I always fuck things up. I'm good for nothing..." all to myself. Then suddenly, my humorous side quipped, "Maybe I should consider becoming a politician!"

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What the Fuck, President?

Thursday, October 19, 2006
The terrorist I was talking about a few days back is supposed to be hanged tomorrow morning. But as the stupid laws have it, you can't hang a prisoner if he files a "mercy plea" to the President, and the President hasn't done anything about it. Where the fuck did that piece of "law" come from? And though it might be justified in rare cases, how the fuck does it apply to a fucking terrorist? Who attacked the Parliament even.

While completely ignoring this important matter, our President is happily going around Assam, meeting moronic self help group workers. I wonder if he even went through this "mercy plea" that was filed. Is he deliberately delaying the terrorist's death because our President is a muslim too? Is he afraid he'd be a target in the terrorists' hit list if he declined the plea? Does he even know that someone has filed a plea, and he has to look it up?

"Kashmiri leaders have said the execution would fuel a Muslim separatist revolt in the Himalayan region that has killed more than 45,000 people since 1989", cries out loud, Reuters India. Hmm. That's about 2600 people a year. But they never said what killed them. It must be the nut freezing cold more than anything else. Bastard leaders and their misleading stats. If you don't have the balls to execute a terrorist because you're afraid it might cause revolts and protests, then you aren't good enough to lead the country. Go lie down on your momma's lap so she can spank you. Morons.

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Aussies Kicked in the Balls

Wednesday, October 18, 2006
Which is exactly what I wanted, and I knew it would happen because their record in the sub continent isn't the greatest. Good job, West Indies. This throws the contest wide open.

And I'd like to take this moment to show my middle finger to all Islamic extremists. Just random anger. That's all for tonight. Now go back to whatever you were doing.

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One For the Emos

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

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It was a bit unusual though, during the qualifiers, there wasn't much of bullshit other than two relatively stronger teams having to play against minnows, Zimbabwe and Bangladesh, to qualify for the main round. So, Shoaib Akthar and Mohammed Asif of Pakistan fail the dope test and are sent back home. Pakistan are always known for unfair play, though Shoaib Akthar claims he is innocent. Yeah right. Him using drugs in all other matches he has played so far is debatable, because of his consistent 150+ kmph bowling.

Though I said West Indies needing to qualify against minnows was bullshit, it is also justifiable to an extent, with their roller coaster form. One day they're wiped out for 80, the next they'd go on to beat a world class team. Such is the inconsistency this team has fallen into, and that adds a bit of an excitement to this contest, in my opinion.

And the pitches aren't the usual flat batsman's paradise that you'd usually find in India. Finally, some respite for the bowlers, who have always come under fire for "not bowling well" on flat tracks. This would test the real skills of a batsman, especially the overrated Virender Sehwag, Kevin Pietersen and other big hitters. The spectator turn out seems to be good too, compared to the previous events.

What sucks though is the pre-match show, hosted by a dumb bitch who is only good enough to show cleavage and not talk cricket. All the "movie stars" are cashing in on this big event as a forum to promote themselves and their dumbass movies during the pre-match show. The cricket experts are hardly given a chance to talk, with the dumb bitch and the homosexual looking co-host ramble on for eternity about unrelated stuff to the match in question.

That pretty much covers everything, for now. Australia seem the favorites, with a never-say-die attitude that they've always had. But again, their record in India isn't the greatest. So it won't be a walk in the park for them. Pakistan, West Indies and England can be probably ruled out because of their recent poor form and lack of match winners. South Africa and New Zealand would fancy their chances, while the latter beat the former comprehensively, defending a less than moderate total of 191. Sri Lanka have been in tremendous form for the past two months, though one can argue they have beaten lesser teams and a watered down English side. And finally, the big one. India (ooh ahh India!). I wouldn't say they're hot favorites. They have a fair chance, because the points between the number two side South Africa and number six Sri Lanka, is very marginal. Any side ranked number two to six can beat another any day. But what I'd like to see is less commercialization of the sport in the country. Every inconsiderate moron in the country seems to be "true cricket fan", with their "Ooh ah India!..." chant. Besides this bullshit and the pre-match show, this cricketing event seems to be better than the previous versions.

P.S: Comment to let me know about your views, and your pick on who'd win this cricketing event.

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I'm Feeling Lucky

Friday, October 13, 2006
I'm Feeling Lucky

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Umm... Err... Ah... So uh....

Thursday, October 12, 2006
Warning: This is a personal post, so if you're not into reading others personal stuff, don't continue.

It's not often you come across a personal post in my blog. But this event, I had to post. It was a typical boring day yesterday, I was sitting at my computer, browsing and listening to music. It was a while since I went online on Yahoo! so I decided to go online and hoped to run into my pals. One of my best buddies was online, and we chatted for a while. The convo changed to the usual "who have you got the hots for" and the like. I told her one of her friend was hot. She is my friend too. More like an aquaintance. Anyway, my buddy already knew I had the hots for her friend, but I told her again anyway.

Then the convo took many twists and turns, blah blah blah and then suddenly, out of nowhere, my buddy went "I'm persuading <hot chick> to call you!" I was like "OMGWTF?!" on the inside, but I told her my phone was downstairs, charging. It was the truth, in fact. She told me to go get it, and that she had to go offline. You should have seen my face then. I had the "Oh no! A hot chick is going to call me, what am I going to say?" look on my face. I'm not much of a conversationalist. I only talk when necessary. So it was only natural I had that look on my face. I switched off my computer, went downstairs because I was sleepy. It was only 7:45 pm. I hadn't slept the day before, and the day before that, I had to go out to the city with my dad. Long story. So I dozed off in a few seconds, had a weird dream and woke up 40 minutes later. My phone was flashing, so I checked it. It had two missed calls, from an unknown number. I was almost sure it was <hot chick>. I don't get a lot of calls, so its not too difficult to guess. And this is where the adventure (or misadventure) started.

I decided to call back the number, but I couldn't get my thumb to press the "call" button. I was really worried that I might run out of things to talk after the "how are you" and "whats up?" exchanges. Strange things were going through my head. I heard some voices in my head. I was trying hard to think of topics to talk about, but in vain. My heart started beating fast, and by this time, my testicles had gone so far up my stomach, they had become ovaries. I wanted to call her back badly, because I didn't want to look like an asshole who doesn't return calls. My thumb was still being adamant about not pressing the "call" button. So I used my index finger instead. Suddenly I felt a surge of confidence, and all the voices in my head disappeared. *beeeep.....* *beeeep.....* The phone was engaged. I took a deep sigh and tried again after two minutes. I decided not to try anymore if it was engaged again. *Tring Tring* *Tring Tring*!

All the recently gained confidence went *pop* and the voices in my head were back. "Holy crap! What do I do now???" I thought. A chick answered. By this time, I knew it was her, but I tried not to sound excited. I went "Uhh, yeah... I got a couple of missed calls from this number. Err... May I know who I'm talking to?". She went, "Slim?" and I'm like "Yeah, and who's this?". I already knew the answer, but I asked anyway. She replied, "It's me, <hot chick>!" and I go "Oh hey! <hot chick>! How are ya? How'd ya get my number?" blah blah blah. Notice the accent I used to sound cool. The call didn't last too long though. Exactly after 1 minute and 34 seconds, she was like "Okay, uhh... I gotta studdy now so..." and I automatically went "Ah awright, I'll talk to ya later. Bye!" *click*

The whole night I was wondering what I did wrong. Was I too formal? Was I too shy and didn't talk well? I was breaking my head, and the voices in my head called me a wimp. I was feeling down, but I tried not to think too much about it, but in vain. Almost 24 hours after the "adventure", my best buddy texts me and asks how it went with her friend. I didn't want to say the whole thing over a text message, so I said I had a lot to talk about it and asked her to go online on Yahoo! She replied she can't make it online because she had stuff to do, and I was amazed by the next sentence of the text message. It said "<hot chick> told me she got a little nervous". Nervous! And to think I thought I was the nervous person! You don't know how much happy this little sentence made me. Ah, life is weird and humorous in every way possible.

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Jesus Loves a Knock Knock Joke

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

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Of All the Moronic Things...

Monday, October 09, 2006
Nu-Metal. Fashion shows. Body suspension. The chicken dance. Dropping the soap in the shower. Throughout history, the most idiotic of humans have invented dumbass activities to entertain themselves. But this one has to be the most moronic of them all. Ghostriding, the new ghetto white-boy craze.

This activity, made popular by the suburban chavs who smoke too much pot, consists of getting OUT of a car while its moving, and posing on the hood, surfing on the roof and sitting on the trunk, usually while one of their idiot "homies" tapes it in a camera. Sometimes they dance alongside the car while its rolling. I hope they get their foot run over.

Here are a couple of videos of morons ghostriding:

Video #1

This guy was riding way too fast to be attempting this. I was hoping the truck would run him over after he jumped off.

Video #2

I hope this video was real. I'd love to see a video of him calling the insurance company.

Unemployed + Too much crack = Ghostriding. A friendly advice: Don't try this at home, folks.

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A Joke

Saturday, October 07, 2006
Yo there, my precious readers. I couldn't get the time to post today too, so here is a quick joke for y'all. (Frequent posting will start in a week, so hang on)

Q: If a blonde and an emo kid jump off a building and hit the ground at the same time, who dies first?

A: The blonde, she drowns in the emo kid's tears.

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Kill the Terrorist

Friday, October 06, 2006
Its been a long 5 years since the terrorist attack on the Indian Parliament. And they finally nab one of the bastards. Just one. And guess what? He happens to be a muslim. "Not surprising, 'cause 96.257% of terrorists in the world happen to be Muslims", a researcher, who doesn't want to be identified for fear of getting attacked, tells me (pssst, the researcher is my alter ego. Don't tell anyone, aight?). But what would be surprising is if the Government (yes, the lame Indian Government) accepts the "plea" from him and his towel headed family. What plea? A plea to reconsider his death sentence, what else? I was like "WHAT THE FUCK, CHUCK?!?!" when I caught up on the news online today. Also, I learnt some fucking politician is backing the plea.

"He still does not want to move a mercy petition seeking clemency. He said he has lost faith in the system." said the terrorists' wife (don't know if she's his third or fourth or even seventeenth though). "Lost faith in the system"... LOL! The ways these towelheads try to get out of the frying pan. The fire even. What I can't digest is the fact that the moronic Human Rights Organizations are supporting his cause.

Fuck it. Fuck terrorists, fuck politicians, fuck the Government, fuck the HRO and fuck you . Its ME who has lost faith in the so called "System".

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This Politician Takes the Cake

Tuesday, October 03, 2006
And probably the icing too. If you think a politician promising the whole State free Telivisions if elected is weird, wait till you hear what a politician from the opposition promised if the party gets elected in the local body elections... Free car for everyone. Yes, you read it right. Car.

What's funnier, no one other than me and my dad seem to be ridiculing this crazy politician. Not even the media (so I really can't cite a source. But you can believe whatever shit I put here, they're all genuine). Looks like we're the only two sane people left in the State. Or it's us who need a reality check...

Oh snap, might as well try and vote the crazy bastards into power and demand the free car.

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An Elephant...

Monday, October 02, 2006
... saw a naked man and blurted out, "How do you EAT with that thing?!?!"

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