Randumb Madness [Argh!]™

Ending Hiatus and Sudoku for Dummies

2007-06-20T02:00:00.000+05:30

Whew! It's been quite a while since I blogged about something. I think I have taken a long enough break, and I think its that time now what people say "It's back to business". To be honest, I've completely forgotten how I've my blog coded for certain features to work, so designs and posts might be a little sloppy for some time. Old readers, hopefully you're keeping an eye for new posts in my blog, and welcome to any new readers out there. I hope you'll find some fun reading my blog! For my comeback, I thought I'd start off with a funny pic I made. Here it is:

Technorati tags: Funny, Humor, Pic, Comeback, Sudoku, Puzzle, Humour, LOL, ROFL

Smartass Google

2007-04-21T19:06:00.000+05:30

Google can be such a smartass sometimes. To experience this yourself, go to Google Maps, and click on the Find Directions tab. Type in "New York, USA" in the start address box, and "Paris, France" in the end address box. Hit get directions, and scroll down the search results into the 20's and see why Google is a smart ass .

Technorati tags: Google, Maps, Google Maps, Funny, Smartass, Humor, Humour, New York, Paris, France, USA, America, Directions, Pic, Hilarious, ROFL, LMAO

Awful Movie Stunt

2007-03-26T23:30:00.000+05:30

If you watched the movie "Hercules in New York" and thought the stunts in it were awful, you are right. I certainly did, especially that awful scene where Arnold fights with a bear... and you can clearly see the retard under the bear costume. Anyway, just when I thought it couldn't get goofier, one of my online friends, Trevor, sends me a stunt clip from an Indian movie... which is indeed goofier. Here's the clip...

Funny as hell, isn't it?

Technorati tags: Video, Goofy, Humor, Funny, Movie, Stunt, Horse, Indian, India, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Hercules, New York, Humour, ROFL, LMAO, Awful

Cricket at its Worst

2007-03-25T17:00:00.000+05:30

We're just two weeks into the Cricket World Cup '07 in the Carribean, and there is just too much news about it... for all the wrong reasons. This World Cup was slated to be the most boring of all since it began in 1975, but it has been making a lot of news, again for all the wrong reasons. It has been filled with controversies, from a funny one like the fallen sight-screen at a practice game to a horrible one like Pakistan team's coach, the great Bob Woolmer's mysterious death, especially soon after the shock defeat of the team to minnows Ireland.

Add to this, the early exit of "Team India" after losses to Bangladesh and Sri Lanka, the excitement reduces a fair bit. And the controversies seem to be happening away from the Carribean as well. Pakistan captain Inzamam's retirement probably was forced, both by the Pakistani management and the "passionate" cricket loving public of Pakistan, after their shock defeat and eventual exit from the Cup. The Indian public seem to be at the same level as their neighbor Pakistan, throwing stones and rampaigng the players' house, burning effigies of the captain and the coach, and a "mock funeral" of the team.

Now, those of you who know me well would know how good I am at rants, and how I'm a cricket fanatic. And indeed I am disappointed by India's performance, but taking to the streets and causing havoc is... putting it simply, idiotic. I don't have much to say on this, except that if these cricket "fanatics" were equally demanding from our politicians as they are from our cricketers, and take to the streets every time a politician does something wrong, we wouldn't still be on the list of third world shitholes.

It remains to be seen what more controversies (and news that is just not about cricket) unfold into the third, fourth and fifth weeks into the World Cup.

Technorati tags: Cricket, India, Pakistan, Inzamam-ul-Haq, Bob Woolmer, Ireland, Media, World Cup, Cup, Carribean, West Indies, Politicians, Controversy, Defeat, Politics, Death, Controversies, Rants, Idiotic, Cricketers

Chicken Eating Cow!

2007-03-21T19:40:00.000+05:30

Lal the Indian cow has good taste in a meal. Who likes dried grass, or damp hay anyway? That's exactly what the cow thought. And Lal, the non-vegetarian cow from Calcutta decided to treat itself to its master's chicken. After a few rounds of chicken, the cow really fell in love with having chicken for lunch. And dinner. And breakfast. The cow kept chowing down and the chicken kept disappearing. The farmer family decided to stand guard at night at the cow shed, after 48 chickens went missing in one month. And they had the shock of their life when they caught their family cow red handed... err... red feeted?.

Perhaps Lal is one of the cows in this picture...

An expert vet says the cow's strange behavior is due to "lack of vital minerals in the body". Whatever that means . I think the cow was a tiger in its past life, just like the villagers believe. Villagers are always right. Apparently, there are videos of the cow achieving this feat, but I haven't found one yet. It would have been totally brutal, posting a video along with this post! What's even funnier is that the CNN article uses "his" atleast once to describe the cow. But whatever, Lal sure provided us with some LOL. Score one for Indian cows.

Technorati tags: Cow, Chicken, Pic, Funny, Humor, Weird, Offbeat, LOL, LMAO, LMFAO, ROFL, Humour, Goofy, India, Indian, Treat, Farmer, Villagers, Vet, Tiger, Animal, Animals, Strange

The Importance of Thumb

2007-03-16T22:36:00.000+05:30

I didn't realize the thumb was so important for everyday life. Actually, I never cared about the thumb... until I cut myself. No. It was not out of an emo moment. It was an accident. Honest! If you don't believe me, screw you! I was trying to cut the damn tag with a blade from this new shirt I bought, and whamo! I was in a hurry and didn't realize I should be taking it slow, and that I should have had my fingers away from the direction the blade was "travelling".

Anyway, I just realized the importance of thumb, even though it has no use in derogatory gestures. I can't lift a damn spoon properly, can't dial a number, can't lift things. Heck, I can't even move the mouse properly without my thumb. The only thing I could possibly think of doing without the thumb now is taking a shit. And then just now, with some trouble, I made a little GIF to humor myself. Here it is:

And by the way, I'm going to sue the shirt company for having 495783452 damned tags on their shirt.

Technorati tags: Emo, Funny, Humor, Pic, Dummy, Razor, Dummies, Humour, Thumb, Cut, Finger, Shirt, Tags, LOL, ROFL, LMAO

Fence Plowing. Wow.

2007-03-11T22:43:00.000+05:30

"Fence plowing". It's the new in-thing amongst American teenagers with no life. First, it was Ghostriding. Just when I thought it was the lamest idea anyone could come up with, someone outdid their retarded self and came up with this fence plowing (Actually, it was me. Everyone everywhere knows that, but one Adam Schwarzenneger-something got his 15 minutes of fame before I could call up Fox news ). Here's the video:

AhEm ... Two things... First, Fox news is groundbreaking. Any channel that interviews the lowest common denominator of the society is groundbreaking. Way to go. Give the producers a cookie. Second, like this one commenter on YouTube points out:

Perhaps somebody should point out that, a few weeks ago when the story first aired on FOX and they were saying it's "the latest teen craze", there were only 7 returns on you tube and 94 on Google when I search "Fence plowing". Up until that point, I've never even heard of the thing. "Now there are a whole bunch of fence plowers on you tube" as they say in this recent video. Now I get 12 replies on you tube and 120,000 on Google. Perhaps it was actually FOX that pioneered teens destroying your expensive privacy fence. Way to go FOX. Score one for the team. F' Yeah!

Here's another video of a common denominator so low that he's a negative integer:

If John Kerry saw these video's, he'd go, "Go get some education, son! Or you'll end up in Iraq!". And he is right. Retards like these would be useful in Iraq to tackle them suicide bombers. Even if they die in the process, there's not much to lose. Good riddance.

Oh by the way, watch out for these idiots in your neighborhood. And don't be shy to take them out with your shotgun. And if you happen to have a brick fence, then you could put a fake wooden fence around it, and watch the fun if these idiots arrive in your neighborhood. You could even record it on video and put it on YouTube to get your fifteen seconds of fame.

Technorati tags: Fence Plowing, Humor, Stupid, Retards, Video, YouTube, Fox, Teenagers, Idiots, Rants, Random, Morons, Bums, WTF

World Cup: A Preview

2007-03-09T23:25:00.000+05:30

Cricket's biggest event is just four days away, and I can't wait! It seems days away, though its very close. It's like when you want to pee urgently, you don't want to hold it in any longer and just want to open the flood gates, but the restroom seems miles away. That's how I'm feeling at the moment! That Australia got anally raped by England first, then New Zealand makes things more interesting, because this one wouldn't (hopefully) be a one-sided event like it was the last time around.

This is probably India's best chance at winning the Cup, since most sides are plagued by injuries. It was a miracle that India got through to the finals the last World Cup with a weaker side than the present one. Plus, the momentum was missing last time, after the team was anally raped by New Zealand (not that there might be a coincidence of the Aussies getting into the finals this time around). But this time, we're the only team along with South Africa, England and New Zealand to go into the World Cup with a winning momentum.

Though you'd hear almost every other person (even those who don't know anything about cricket, but want to show off), including half-baked sports anchors and dumbass celebrities say that this is anyone's World Cup, I personally feel only a couple of teams have the firepower last till glory - Australia, South Africa, India and maybe Sri Lanka, if their batting form picks up. New Zealand getting defeated by Bangladesh only adds to the uncertainity of the game, and now India would have to watch their backs because Bangladesh figures in the same group in the first round, and are capable of beating most top teams on their day!

The hyped up "big hitters" of the game - Kemp, Dhoni, Pieterson etc. would be put to test for their patience and consistency in the newly laid wickets in the Carribean. Heck, I'm surprised a big hitter like me never made it to even the State team. I'm sure I'll be 23.869% more consistent than M.S. Dhoni, and that'd mean a heck of a lot for India. I still remember the day when I was playing street cricket with a few of my friends, I hit a strong leg side shot and it hit one of my neighbor so hard in the cheek that she had to have her molar teeth removed!

But as long as India can last the distance in the World Cup, I'd have no grudges against the political bastards who come in the way of every prospective future cricketer.

Batsmen to watch out for: Ricky Ponting, Graeme Smith, Sachin Tendulkar, Inzamam Ul-Haq, Rahul Dravid, Mike Hussey, Sanath Jayasuriya, Chris Gayle.

Bowlers to watch out for: Glenn McGrath, Makhaya Ntini, Shaun Pollock, Chaminda Vaas, Muttiah Muralitharan, Sanath Jayasuriya, Anil Kumble, Zaheer Khan, Shane Bond, Monty Panesar, Liam Plunkett.

Funny Ads

2007-02-28T23:39:00.000+05:30

Google Ad's these days errr... actually contextual Google ads these days are really random. And hilarious. So hilarious, it gets me - a moderately depressed lonely guy - rolling on the floor, laughing out loud. I could have put it ROFLOL, but I like typing long sentences. I'm nerdy like that.

.

Cap's advice to me on depression generated a couple of really hilarious ads. Well, it was hilarious to me atleast. Contextual ads do have a purpose... to entertain and make people roll on the floor and laugh their ass off. But not for generating $$$, as I found out the hard way . Perhaps Google should rethink their product name... Google AdNonSense seems like a good idea .

Technorati tags: Contextual Ads, Contextual Advertising, Google, AdSense, Funny, Humor, Hilarious, Humour, ROFL, LOL, Pic, Personal

20 Reasons I Want to be a Dog

2007-02-24T23:52:00.000+05:30

1. I could pee anywhere I want to, and no one would complain.

2. No one would complain if I grow/don't shave off hair in "unusual" places.

3. I could wake up and go to sleep anytime I want

4. There would be no stupid rules in "dating games", like "oooh, you gotta be handsome and wear tight leather pants and have a 15 inch schlong to get laid". Even a pug is considered cute.

5. I could fuck any random bitch (no pun intended) I want.

6. I could eat whenever I please. I'd just have to wag my tail at my dumbass "master", make a puppy face and I've just got my meal!

7. I don't have to take the pains to bath, someone will do that for me.

8. I just do some stupid tricks in front of chicks, and I've got myself some hotties for fans.

9. There are no everyday human worries. I'd get to lie around all day in my doghouse.

10. I'd get to bite random people who I find stupid.

11. I would have atleast one best friend if I were a dog.

12. I could pant and drool over chicks as much as I want to and they wouldn't look at me like I'm some kind of creep.

13. I could get into a hot chicks lap by just wagging my tail.

14. I would finally get to hear what a "dog whistle" sounds like.

15. I don't think dogs suffer from bipolar disorder and depression.

16. No one would complain if I go around town chasing cats like they would if I did it now.

17. I have more chances of appearing on a movie if I were a dog.

18. There are no disgraces to Dogkind like there is to Humankind like Paris Hilton, Ian Benardo and Britney Spears.

19. There aren't any corporate dickheads in the Dogkind.

20. Woof woof!

Technorati tags: Dogs, Random, Life, Funny, Humor, Dog, Humour, LOL, ROFL

Wisdom of the Slim - 2

2007-02-22T23:11:00.000+05:30

English teacher: "In English, a double negative forms a positive. But there is no language where a double positive can form a negative."

Smartass Slim: "Yeah, right."

Technorati tags: Smartass, English, Language, Humor, Humour, Funny, ROFL, LOL

It's Been A While...

2007-02-22T22:10:00.000+05:30

...since I posted something. In fact, its been a while since I've been "normal". The irregular posting started about a month ago, and I've ever since been trying to figure out what the problem is. Self analysis is boring, and its something I can do without. I'd rather prefer a nagging girlfriend. But heck, I'm doing it anyway.

Below is a little "checklist" I'm making to analyze the possible reasons:

1. ~~Bloggers block~~ - Can't be. I have shitloads of material to post, some of them I can't because its not "news" anymore.

2. Depression.

3. Laziness - Hell yeah! I've always been lazy, more so recently because of the depression.

4. Deprsssion.

5. ~~Lack of interest to post~~ - No!

6. Depression.

7. Too much time spent on fixing and updating the template - I can't help it, I'm a perfectionist... almost .

8. Depression.

9. Overtime on achieving xHTML validity - That is a bitch, but I had about 350+ errors which I've narrowed it down to 10.

10. Depression - I know I sound emo here, but fuck you! I am depressed!

I need professional help. I think. Or I should stop hanging out on MySpace, full of emo kids.

Technorati tags: Depression, Life, Personal, Blog, MySpace, Emo

Cupid = Asshole

2007-02-14T22:27:00.000+05:30

Cupid is an asshole. After all, all he could hook me up with in the past were losers. The first one, a Dutch bitch (exactly a fucking year ago). Just when I thought I'd forgotten that episode of my ~~wonderful~~ pathetic life, the 14th of February shows up . Then Asshole hooked me up with an Indian whore (don't even ask) and more recently, the crush I had on hot chick turned out to be a dead end. She is the dumbest chick I've ever met! Dumber than the hot blonde chick with big boobs aka Pamela Anderson.

Luckily for me though, there is a way to vent my anger. I could join these idiots and go around town beating couples to quench my jealousy. You see, I get pissed off when I see couples hugging and kissing and I'm left only with little Johnson to talk to . Those extremist assholes may be ashamed to admit it, but I'm not. Not at all. I'm jealous. And little Johnson is getting depressed being all alone. Maybe I should register at some personals site. Maybe I shouldn't, because the love-arrow wielding sonofabitch might hook me up with a pedophile for all I know. Ah fuck it .

Technorati tags: Valentines Day, Valentine, Valentines, Love, Life, Relationships, Pamela Anderson, Boobs, Personal, Bitch, Asshole, Cupid, Politics, Shiv Sena, VHP, Video, YouTube, Humor, Humour, Hindu, Muslim, Anti-Valentine

Randumb Ramblings

2007-02-12T21:02:00.000+05:30

Mariah Carey is me hero. She calls herself prude and poses for Playboy.
I'm forming an exploratory committee to explore why I shouldn't be President. Anyone interested in joining the committee may contact me.
Romano Prodi should just shut the fuck up and go back to Italy and handle his "tough coaliation Government" rather than kissing Indian politician ass.
Bipolar is on the rise I think, one of my friends has just been declared bipolar, along with a few others I know.
Pictures of Ashley Massaro turned me on, but helping my dad chase this wall climbing frog sonofbitch just now turned me off.
I've gotten even more turned off now, I just recieved a spam comment on the "New Template!" post (Thank you Cap and Lizze ).

Bad girls suck, good girls swallow.
Dimension Zero is one of the most underrated bands.
Operator logos piss me off. I don't like it covering up the boobies in my cellphone wallpapers.
I have a dentist appointment tomorrow and I'm shit scared of dentists. I hope I don't bite this dentist chick tomorrow.
This retarded wrestling fan would make anyone ROFL.
With all the talk about technological improvements and advancement of mankind, they still don't have a painless way of tooth removal/filling.
I remember a year ago, I almost had sex in a 3D chat, but the chick got disconnected and I'm hung like a horse ever since.
They say opposites attract, then how come super hot and pretty chicks never date me?
People think Mr. T is unintelligent because he uses what we believe to be made up words like jibba jabba. However those words are the answers to the most complicated mathematical problems in the universe. Mr. T. has known this his entire life and does not tell anyone because ones brain would implode if you tried to comprehend the question. Mr. T. pities those who try.

I think I need a shave. Down there too.
Rap, hip-hop and electronic music are the worst forms of music known to mankind.
The Dixie Chicks and Carrie Underwood don't deserve Grammys.
At this rate, Leonardo Dickcaprio and Cars are going to walk away with the Oscars
On the 0th day, Mr. T created God. Then he made God do the rest of the work while Mr. T pitied him.
This is getting quite lame, 'cause I'm not used to being random on short notice.
I hate it when I allow people to give free adivce, they don't... and when I don't want it, I'm flooded with free advice.
I want to post about the cricket World Cup and the Indian team announced for it today, but I'm too sleepy now.
I was going to make another random Mr. T Fact, but he pitied me into not doing it.

Technorati tags: Random, Funny, Humor, Life, Blogging, Mariah Carey, Playboy, Romano Prodi, Politics, Italy, Mr. T, Oscars, Academy Awards, Grammys, Dixie Chicks, Ashley Massaro

American Tard

2007-02-07T22:13:00.000+05:30

Someone should start a show called American Tard and put all the idiots who audition in American Idol in the show. Sometimes these idiots try to be so funny, its not funny at all. And yes, unfortunately I watched American Idol for a second time. But what I saw in it was enough to make me never watch it again. Take a look at this retard...

Ian Benardo. He's even got his name on his T-Shirt in case he gets lost in Wal-Mart. And he wants to be the next American Idol... great. He is a superstar, a singer and a dancer. He is also a pathological liar. He even calls the road kill he found "wealthy fur". He must be the resultant of a family that lied to him as a child too many times about talent. He says he has two therapists... wonder which one of them shoved him off to the other.

His singing... I'm surprised Cowell, Paula and Randy haven't had a breakdown since they met him. "Gloria... Gloria...", what a faggot. We might probably see Paula drunk again on TV after that. And Oh. My. God. He actually says "thank you" after Randy is all . "Are you real? Is... is this real", Randy goes. Yes, he is real... a real moron. And Simon must be getting soft, his criticism was real mellow. Or he must have learned to deal with the mentally retarded. "It's just rubbish". "Rubbish? That's British for garbage?" Oh wow. Give the man a cookie, he actually knows what rubbish means.

I'm amazed Simon got bored, I was laughing my ass off just like Paula and the guest judge. He can have his face right there on the sign, but it would read American Tard. Or better yet, he should have his face on the side of a milk carton with "missing" written on his big forehead. I doubt anyone would claim to be his family though. And now, he's out there wandering the streets. Watch out people.

Technorati tags: Retard, Idiot, Stupid, Funny, Humor, Closet Gay, American Idol, Entertainment, Humour, Video, YouTube, Tard, Faggot

Harry Potter Helpline

2007-02-06T23:09:00.000+05:30

For all those who laughed when I said Harry Potter sucked, here's a bit of news to prove myself right. Apparently, a retailer book store is opening up a "Harry Potter Helpline" for distressed fans. Hmm. That's gotta mean something. Something in the lines of "this series of books suck so much that it even makes stupid teenagers depressed".

So, two characters are going to be "killed off" in the "final" installation of the book. I hope one of them is Potty pants himself. If he lives, we can be sure Rowling would attempt a "the real" final installation when she someday becomes a broke, single mother again after spending all that British Pounds on luxury and "charity". Harry Potter Helpline, getting depressed (distressed?) over lame fantasy characters... this is proof that there are more stupid people than me out there. All the media frenzy, all that hype... British media and the media in general keep finding ways to go beyond rock bottom. Did I mention this was a third page story in our newspaper? What's next? Jade Goody's own series of racist books???

It seems anyone can make a quick buck by slapping in some goofy fantasy story and weird characters. In fact, I'm gonna work on a novel myself (with Cap's help, of course). Just add a goofy storyline, characters with corny names, made up words (right out of a bad dream), some sex scenes and we've just got ourselves a bestseller... and maybe a box-office hit as well, if it pleases the Hollywood Gods. Oh man, think of all the things I could buy with all that money... all that fame... all those hot chicks Cap and I would enjoy! Hollywood, here I come!

Technorati tags: Harry Potter, Books, Movies, Fandom, Humor, Humour, Funny, Corny, Blogging, Lame, Rowling, Depressing, Helpline, Death, WTF

Party Rants

2007-02-04T21:55:00.000+05:30

Finally! I get to rant about the "party" I attended about four of days ago. It's a surprise I could hold it in for this long! Before I begin, this might seem a long post. But trust me, I've made it as humorous as possible. It's a good read (atleast I think so). So don't get all "oh man this is long" and read on. So with that said, let me get to the gory details.

We (My dad and I) were to go there in a rental car. A boxy rental car, actually. One with uncomfortable leg space. Well, any car I get in has bad leg space, 'cause I'm an unusually tall guy. Add to that, a ~~little~~ heavy traffic. One that won't move an inch for half an hour. Enough to make my crotch all wrinkly and painful. You would imagine traffic can be fun, given that there are a few hotties around in the nearby vehicles. That's a negative as well. I only find in front of me, 20 teenagers packed into the back of a mini truck, five of them sitting on the edge. And it's very difficult to look around for chicks, with all that smoky vehicle fart that some people call an emission.

So there I am, stuck in the fucking traffic, right. I start getting a little dizzy, with all that smoke. I guess no one follows emission standards. Luck is something when you're in such a situation, you'd find a way out of it... like turn on the air conditioner, and roll up the windows. Bad luck is when the boxy rental doesn't have an A/C. Really bad luck is when the boxy rental doesn't have an A/C and the day is realtively hot that you can't roll up the windows. So there I am, really desperate for ~~a hot chick~~ air. Clean air. I slowly start to lose consciousness. And then, a miracle happens. No, I don't see Jesus. The traffic gets a move on.

Not for long though. Fifty feet later, it stops again. Luckily though, in five minutes, the traffic is clear. We show up at the party 45 minutes late. Thankfully. I mean, whats a party without hot chicks in tank tops and revealing clothes, without drinking, without good music etc. Even if the party is a celebration of 25 years of married life (My sister-in-law's uncle and Aunt). Before I continue the rant, I gotta salute my sister-in-law's uncle, for its a great feat to have survived the 25 years of shit his wife put him through. No wonder he is prematurely gray, and bald. Well, semi bald. Okay, back to the party. Just when you would think it can't get any worse than not having hot chicks in bikinis, it actually does get worse...

"And how can it?", you ask? With stupid "games". See, this place was relatively small, but atleast 50-60 people had made it to the party. So it was naturally crowded. This place had four pillars right in the middle, forming a square. Imagine the roof having four legs, like a table and you'll get a clear picture. And for this first "game", all the 60 people had to go in circles around it when a stupid music played. Sort of like musical chairs. Each pillar was given the name of a city. When the music stopped, everyone had to "grab" a pillar, while the "conductor" would randomly shout out the name of one of the selected four city's name. Whoever were touching that pillar were out of the game, and the game continued till only one person was left. Oh. My. God . And its nothing to be proud of when someone wins this game, its as childish as it can get. But no, one of the elder sisters of A won (lets call her Loudmouth) and she started boasting. Like she had won the FIFA world cup for her team single handedly. (I made it almost to the end and almost won, if I do say so myself ).

"HEY SON! TAKE A PICTURE OF ME!!!", Loudmouth screamed to her son. And everybody pretended it sounded funny and let out supressed laughter. Atleast I did. Then came the next game. For this one, all the sixty people were divided into three groups, and this game would consist of four rounds of tasks, and whoever had the maximum points at the end would win. "Ah, finally! Something that involves teamwork and could actually be fun!", I thought. I was going to be wrong, of course.

My dad was in another team, and he was made the leader of his group, which was not a big surprise since he is a natural leader. Loudmouth was the leader of another team (thank God for that), and some unknown person (must be a relative of A) was the "leader" of the group I was in. First round. The leader had to arrange the group members in an ascending-descending order of height, alternatively. Jesus H. Christ! Lame game, and lamer still when you would think this is as easy as it can get, but our "leader" sucks at getting it done. Add to it all the disorganized people in my team. It took almost an eternity to accomplish this simple task. Apparently every group had a majority of disorganized people, and no one had finished this simple task five minutes into the "game". Finally, when it was accomplished, our team came in second. Loudmouth's team was first (wow) and my dad was stuck with a team consisting 95% of disorganized people.

Second round. An annoying music would be played in a half arsed stereo system and all the group members had to dance to it. Whichever team appeared to be the most synchronized would win. Fuck that. I hate dancing to shitty music. And I'm only used to headbanging. Now, I had to follow the "leaders" corny dance moves. Going in circles. Wiggling your fingers in the air. Shaking your butt. The chicken dance and what not. It was chaos. And not surprisingly, we came last in that round. My dad's group won, which was a surprise since it had the most number of disorganized people.

Third round. This one consisted of the leader having to memorize all the teams' married couples' date of anniversary, and say it in front of the announcer/host/whatever you call it (actually, I can call her anything, but lets stick to "announcer"). My dad unleashed his memory power and it was a cakewalk victory for his team. The leader of our group sucked at memory skills, added to his dancing, organizing and leadership skills. He even tried to cheat his way into winning this round, which was pathetic since you don't achieve anything big if you win. Not even a cookie. I don't remember who came in second. Actually, I don't care to remember.

Fourth round. Last round (THANK YOU JESUS!!!!). Another memorizing game, and obviously I expected us to finish last. This time he had to memorize all the names of the team members. And you know someone needs a time-out when they can't even remember a name that has only four letters. The leader had to ask me twice what my name was. I don't know who won, because by the time they were announcing the "winners" of this round, I had excused myself to take a piss. I took the time to kick the walls and bash my head on the wall as well. When I returned, dads team had won overall and (surprise surprise) we had come in second. Nothing to be proud of, of course, but there were handshakes and whistling and cheering all around.

I was rolling my eyes at these pathetic losers, when someone announced dinner was ready. "Oh boy! End of heartache!", I thought. I was wrong again. Bad turned to worse. The food sucked to say the least. The soup made me want to throw up, but I somehow downed it (with much difficulty) so everyone would think I was a nice guy. Finishing dinner was a Herculian task. But when I did finish it, the announcer (the daughter of A, did I mention?) err... announced that there were random, spot prizes to be won, and asked everyone not to leave immediately. Wow, our first attempt to flee foiled.

Random prizes included "Who-has-the-most-number-of-credit-cards-right-now" prize, "Who-has-a-PAN-card-right-now" prize, "Well dressed couple", "Who-has-shades" prize and other lame prizes of that sort. Everyone were rushing to the front, like pathetic losers, to win something desperately. Oh my God, they even had a "Who-has-the-most-coins" prize, and Loudmouth rushed to the "stage" to show off her cheapskate skills. Oh my God. I mean, coins just kept coming out of her purse... 1... 2... 3... 45... 89... 694... it seemed like it was never gonna end! The announcer got tired and just shoved her the prize. I was surprised there wasn't a "Who-has-the-loudest-mouth" prize and a "Who-is-the-most-disorganized" prize. There would have been a lot of competition for that, though Loudmouth would have won the former without competition.

Finally, it was over. We found an opportunity to leave, and used it to our advantage. I thought the time would never come! I wanted to leave desperately. It was an evening dominated by Loudmouth, disorganized people and bad food. Though, I did learn something from this experience. After all, we all keep learning something from everthing we do. I learnt that I wasn't a pathetic loser after all. Atleast, I wasn't rock bottom. There were loads of people in the party, desperately trying to win something to make themselves feel better. I guess they must be sore losers in real life. I also learnt that I was good at making people laugh with my antics. See, I'm never myself when I go out. But this time, I tried being myself and it worked well. Looks like I have a good future in stand up and slapstick comedy. And I read somewhere chicks like humorous guys too, so its all going well after all! But I really hope I never end up in a stupid party again. And never meet all these strange people ever again.

Technorati tags: Rants, Personal, Party, Boring, Humor, Humour, Weird, Losers, Stupid, Jesus H. Christ, Pissed, Life, Stupid Games, Lessons, Pathetic Losers, OMG, WTF

New Template!

2007-02-03T09:49:00.000+05:30

Hope its not an eyesore. Well, atleast not too much. It's probably not complete yet, or maybe it is. I'm not sure. I'm too sleepy right now, I just want to go straight to bed. I've been working overtime on this, and it hasn't turned out 100% the way I wanted it. Send me your feedback, suggestions, cookies and whatever else you want to that might help me better this template. If you notice any errors/bugs, please notify me. Template fixes, the party rant I was talking about in my last post, more posts and much more coming up later. Right now, I'm off to slumber land.

Technorati tags: Personal, Blog, Blogging, Template, New, Sleepy, Tired, Coding, CSS

Wisdom of The Slim

2007-01-31T23:37:00.000+05:30

I've been wanting to introduce this little section for a long time, but a few things came up, I kept chasing even more lost time than ever and eventually had to take a little break. But now that things are beginning to look normal, I guess I can officially declare this little section open. But before I get to that, I have a few rants. Today, me and my dad got invited to a party, and Oh. My. God. Did it get me cranky or what?

Oh wait... I guess I can't rant about the party until tomorrow... its getting late. And moreover, the party has made me really sleepy . So, a quick intro to Wisdom of The Slim and I'm off for the day. It's a new thing/category/topic, where I post witty (read: stupid) one liners, two liners, three liners, x liners, some of them coined by.... who else? The one and only, Yours Truly . These one liners would be thought provoking, funny, boring or just plain stupid. It depends on my mood.

I decided to include this section as an excuse when I'm too lazy to post long (and boring) articles. It is also a way to share with you all whatever I've learnt in my 19 years of existence, share my stupidity and queer sense of humor. So with that, here's the first one of its kind (and my favorite):

"If ignorance is bliss, you're orgasmic."

Technorati tags: Personal, Rants, Bitchings, Wisdom, One Liners, Ignorance, Stupidity, Blogging

Bikini = Porn in India

2007-01-28T23:02:00.000+05:30

Our politicians have a unique way of interpreting things. See, there was this channel called AXN, which was my only source to some hot bikini clad women on TV. Now I've been deprived of that, thanks to our politician friends in the parliament. I learnt that the channel had been banned, but I wasn't too concerned because I thought it would be just another farce, like the (in)famous Blogger ban last July. But I started getting edgy when the channel never made a comeback for three days.

After some quick research, I found out the channel has been banned till March 15. Just for showing a few bikini clad chicks (sometimes transparent), and a program titled "Worlds Sexiest Commercials", the Government has slapped a ban for "indecent" shows. So there's the math. Bikini = Porn. I know you're laughing, but I'm not 'cause I'm the one that is deprived of my daily eye candy of internet chick watching, porno and TV. Now my babe watching will drop by 30% atleast, which is not a good thing for a horny 19 year old.

Jokes apart, the reason given for the ban by the Government is "tastless" TV. Oh, give me a break. Only watching government run channels do you get "tasteless" TV. You want tasteless TV, just tune into the government sports channel. All they air are golf matches, a boring game of snooker, horse racing, kabaddi, Olympic games from a decade ago, some "sport" where one player slowly pushes an almost liquid-like "ball" with an ice hockey stick on a smooth surface and, another one guides it to the "finish line" without even touching the liquid-like ball (sorry for the long description, I have no idea what this "sport" is called), and any boring sport under the sun. Chess even! Oh, and don't forget the annoying islamic music playing in the background most of the time.

You want tasteless TV? How about tuning in to the "National" TV. Stupid cultural programs, again mostly consisting of annoying islam music, but this time, some weird people wearing crazy costumes dancing . How can one forget the dumbass quiz programs, where the host asks simple questions like "Whats 1 + 1" and the contestant goes "uhhh... 5!", and the audience boo him and go, "No dumbass! Its 89!". India has shitloads of languages, and there are equal number of government run channels in each one, which are equally bad, to put it lightly. And they dare call the Worlds Sexiest Commercials tasteless. Guess the old owls in the parliament (pun intended) need a briefing on interesting TV.

But amidst all of this shit, there is something to cheer about for the uhhh... morally-challenged, like me. Apparently, the Government is due to pass a bill that would allow the broadcast of adult content after 11 pm. I guess the politicians themselves are getting pretty desperate for some boobies on late night TV. I'm not very excited though, because kissing scenes could be adult content in our politicians dictionary. But for now, I gotta compensate that 30% loss by downloading some torrents. Sigh.

Technorati tags: AXN, TV, Entertainment, CSI, Vegas, Television, Programming, Worlds Sexiest Commercials, Sexy, Bikini, Hot, Babes, Adult, India, Indian Government, Moral Policing, Stupid, Weird, Rants

Goody Two Shoes

2007-01-28T11:15:00.000+05:30

It's a racists worst nightmare. One moment you're insulting someone (thinking you're) on your way to fame, and the next, you're made to kiss the ass of the entire masses of the race of the person you insulted. It happened to Kramer and now, Jade Goody of Big Brother fame wants to be "goody" two shoes. She's on her way to India, apparently to "apoligize to people", as Indiatimes' version of Times of India puts it. Obviously, she isn't on the Government's list of "official guest".

Blair and the House of Commons probably had a role on this. They're already hit with Islamic problems, and the last thing they wanted was Goody running her mouth like that on National (international?) TV. I hope to find a video of Blair conversing with Goody about it. He would probably be all like, "Aye bitch! Do you realize what jeopardy you have caused on our relations wi.... nuclear deal.... buttsecks with Mushar...errr... world domination.... blah blah" with his funny little accent.

Though, I wonder what Ms. Goody Two Shoes would do for fun down here. Obviously she can't go around calling people "dog" or point at a random person and tell them to go back to "the slum". Thats as stupid as going to a gangsta territory and calling them niggers. She better not make the mistake of visiting Calcutta, or atleast hope the people are ignorant (as they usually are) about the Big Brother incident, because there are plenty of emotional bastards out there who get provoked very easily and would give her a hard time.

My guess is that pretty much wherever she goes, she would get a hard time from local politicians, who are always looking for an opportunity to boost their votes by debating in length about unimportant issues (Yes, believe me. Our local politicians never look into issues of importance, like proper roads or good infrastructure. But they always seem to boost their votes! Lets just pretend we don't know how that happens). So yes, Goody is probably in for a trip of her lifetime, and it isn't going to be very pleasant. She will be atleast food poisoned once during her stay (which would be played down), which she would blame on the "stupid" Indian spicy food of course! She would be better off staying in a hotel room, stay low profile, eating soy beans, tea and crumpets.

Technorati tags: Jade Goody, Big Brother, Bitch, Boring, Publicity, Cheap Publicity, Politics, Racist, Funny, Entertainment, News, Current Events, Goody Two Shoes, Dumbass

Reality TV Hits New Low

2007-01-25T22:20:00.000+05:30

Reality shows never thrilled me. In fact, it repels me like how fat and ugly chicks repel a horny-ass teenager on a prom night. Most reality shows are useless and baseless (you'd agree if you aren't one of those Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie and Simon Cowell worshippers). But the hyped up season 6 of American Idol, and the way Paula Abdul, one of the judges ended up drunk on Fox [video], I was intrigued to watch it. And that's when I realized reality shows had dropped to a new low.

In the beginning of the show, there were a lot of awful singers auditioning. By "awful", I'm being polite. So you can imagine how bad they were (Actually, I hate any stereotype, Hilary Duff or Kelly Clarkson-like poppy, lovey-dovey song, but I'll just pretend I liked the other singers for now). At every opportunity available, Simon Cowell would insult the person auditioning. Not just their awful singing, also their looks, dress, hairdo etc. And I noticed a lot of developmentally challenged (read: fat, ugly, nerdy, shortypants etc.) people auditioning. Cowell would have a go at them as well, irrespective of their singing. What surprises me is that there hasn't been a single lawsuit filed for defamation yet. I mean, most Americans love money. They'd jump at every opportunity to make a quick buck by filing a lawsuit.

It wouldn't surprise me if including awful singers, especially the developementally challenged ones, was Simon's idea to climb a few notches up the celeb charts, by making controversial and mean comments. Or it could be that these people are paid to get insulted in front of national TV. Hmm. Either way, human morals have hit a new low. And on the other hand, we have another useless "reality" show, Big Brother. I can't help but mention it, if not blog about it in detail. The only worth the show has is help improve has-been celebrities climb a character high in the celebrity list, so they can be in the news and idiots who watch worthless reality TV would kiss their asses.

Be it corporate assholes who want to control what an artist can/cannot do and take 98% of the money their albums make, idiots who are ready to get insulted in front of national TV for a few bucks or stupid ass has-been celebs dissing, insulting and racially abusing in hope that they'd be the talk of the town, reality TV and human morals have hit an all time low. It remains to be seen how much more worse it could possibly get.

Technorati tags: American Idol, Paula Abdul, Simon Cowell, Reality TV, Reality Show, Music, Entertainment, Rants, Celebrities, Big Brother, Stupid People

I'm Back!

2007-01-23T23:24:00.000+05:30

... and this must be sad news to a lot of people, because I'm going to start boring you all to death again! Ah, so anyway, this was a much needed break, especially with all the things that have been going on. Don't worry, I'm not going to put all the personal shit right here... I'm not going to start boring you all to death all that immediately .

But during this "little" break, I missed a few things. I missed Lizze's and Cap's blog posts (I'm a regular reader, you know). Have a lot to catch up. And most importantly, I missed Cap's birthday (grrr). She turned 180 (don't look at me, go to her blog and see for yourself). I mean, what could be more fun than hanging out with an almost two centuries old person with a cat named TFC (the fucking cat), and watching them blow all the 180 candles on the birthday cake? (*pufff* *pant* *grunt*... I know, I'm evil )

I missed all my online friends (Komal, Balla, Yogi, Jay. Oh, and how can I forget Elena, even though she probably had a bad PMS and deleted all her online contacts ), and have a lot of catching up to do with them. I've completely lost track of all the blogs I read. Must have missed atleast 20 posts in each blog. And then there are the usual things that I would have missed... porno, hot chicks on MySpace, and tons of new music on Last.fm. And probably some bullshit celebrity news that is only worth making fun of.

But heck, I'm back and I'm feeling a lot better from the things that were bothering me (Thank you Liz ). I'm not completely okay, but I guess I'm good enough to handle them..... for now atleast lol. Now, I got some searching to do and find something stupid to blog about...

Technorati tags: Comeback, Return, Blog, Blogging, Personal, Life, Emo, Personal Shit

Camels Are People Too

2007-01-03T22:07:00.000+05:30

Like I mentioned in one of my previous posts, we Indians take the definition of a word to a whole new level. 'Specially political terms. This time, secularism gets a whole new definition. Adding a simple prefix pseudo to it, Secularism in India is defined to perfection.

First, the Madras high court made a good move by banning slaughter of camels in the name of religion by Muslims. "The interim injunction granted by the honourable court is that no animals (camels) should be slaughtered during Bakrid or for any religious purpose. The reason is that this will spread diseases like anthrax to the native cattle and also it brings some bacteria that will affect the humans"

Then rather surprisingly, the next day, the ban was vacated! Reason: "There is no law in the state against the slaughter of animals. Besides, under sections 296 and 298 of the Chennai Corporation Act, the Corporation Commissioner could authorise the slaughter of animals even in places other than abattoirs."

And no one bothers about the anthrax and bacteria and the human lives all of a sudden? Of course they don't. There are far more dangerous things than anthrax or bacterias (or is it bacterium? I suck at biology, so pardon me), like the Islamic extremists, who might - putting it politely - protest the move. A poor little bacteria would kill far less people than a religious fanatic deprived of err... "religious rights" would.

And damn right this is pseudo secular. I'll tell you why. In a moment. Let me bash the religious fanatics a little more. "According to the Holy Quran, God appeared in Prophet Ibrahim (Abraham's) dream and asked him to sacrifice something that was most dear to him. Prophet Ibrahim decided to sacrifice his own son, Ismail. However, when he put a knife on Ismail's throat, God replaced his son with a goat through a miracle. The festival seeks to convey that sacrifice is supreme," reasons the article.

If sacrifice is supreme, why not sacrifice your barbaric nature for the sake of secularism? For the sake of the survival of the poor animals. Hey, animals are people too... in a way. Heck, if that doesn't convince them, one of the biggest goats of the century was "sacrificed" a few days ago. A goat named Saddam. Why not consider it as the last animal "sacrifice" and turn over a new leaf? For the sake of Democracy. And by the way, I don't see the animal rights activist Maneka Gandhi fighting for camels' rights. Is she being racist towards camels???

Right, pseudo secularism... When its time for a non Muslim festival, like Diwali, there are millions of restrictions. Like "no bursting crackers after 9 pm" (Yeah right, as if people go to bed at or before 9). "No bursting crackers that have a decibel of more than 125". Right, as if we have a sonograph or whatever to measure the sound. And as if there is someone going around the neighborhood with a sonograph, enforcing this stupid law. Personally, I hate fireworks. Its for dimwits. But still, a restriction is a restriction. And when restrictions/rules don't apply to particular sections of the society, particularly the "minority", its pseudo secularism. This just goes to show that the Government is full of tiny balled idiotas, who can't face a minority group and say, "Fuck you, Sparky. You're part of a Democracy, and rules apply to you too."

Heck, muslims seem to get away with anything these days. In the name of their religion. And this gives me an idea. I could convert into a mulsim, kill the snoring grandpa next door, rape a hot chick because I'm getting really desperate, then drive around town running over pedestrians to please my psychotic alter ego, and get away with it all. Just like a black person would, after raping and brutally murdering a nun by saying, "You fuckin' cracka ass racist! It's juz cuz I'm black ain't it? You say that fuckin' word like you know what you be talkin' bout! You is ignorant!"

Technorati tags: Muslim, Islam, Religion, Politics, India, Government, Society, Secularism, Secular, Law, Culture, Opinion, Camel Sacrifice, Animal Rights, Animals, Pseudo Secularism

To Be or Not to Be?

2006-12-31T22:26:00.000+05:30

No, this is not a Hamlet-like suicidal question. This is more in the tone of a lonely 19 year old guy from India, stuck between worlds and wondering if its worth still being a pessimist, or to turn into an optimist and expect some good stuff this new year. Optimist because the year is over, and I've survived some pretty nasty shit(s?) in life. But pessimism takes over at the thought of "what more shit would this new year bring along?"

From being hung like a horse, to being chick-less, being stuck in a shit hole of a place, trying - in vain - at getting some traffic to this blog, and to other pretty serious things that I won't mention, its been a pretty rough and tough year. Atleast some people, like my good friend Elena, had a pretty good year. You'd think posts like that would make you jealous subconciously, and in turn would make you more determined to work harder and come out successfully, no matter what (bad) luck has in store for you. If only it were that easy.

I think one of my major resolutions this year should be to become a celebrity. Then I'd get to go to foreign lands, adopt a child from an unknown African or Asian country (to increase popularity), make out with hot chicks (Shannon Elizabeth and Scarlett Johansson hopefully), get drunk and flash my crotch to the paparazzi and STILL be famous, and be the talk of the town. Hey, I'm just human and I'm entitled to have unrealistic resolutions.

Ah, so 2007. What to expect? I'm not so sure yet. It has been a rough ride, this year. Actually, the past 3 years. And recovery has been slow, and it seems the harder I try to get something done, the deeper I fall into this invisible, but very much existant dark, deep hole. Feeling of emptiness is no fun, obviously. I guess at some point of time, you have to step on other people in the hole and make your way up, using them as "steps". Or maybe one just needs some good luck. I don't know. I gotta wait and see, careful not to let any fucker use me as a "step".

I'm pretty sure most of the readers would be able to relate to this mixed feelings/emotions whatever. One moment you're depressed over something, and suddenly the next, you have a sudden surge of optimism and want to do out-of-this-world things. Then you're depressed again. And the cycle continues. Atleast thats what it has been in my case (I think I'm a bit bipolar). But lets just hope this new year, there would be less terrorism, less towelheaded extremists, less stupid people, no emo and pop punk bands at all, less corrupt politicians, no attention whore celebrities and no fake ass rappers and hip hoppers. Most of all, lets hope this year would be totally wacko (like my blog)!

Wish you all a very happy and prosperous New Year (this is so totally unlike me)! And hot women for all (now this is more like me), even Clay Aiken. Lets make some realistic resolutions, people. And keep them!

P.S. Sorry for the emo nature in some parts of the post. This is one of the very few times you'll find The Slim being emo, so make the most of it to be nosey .

Technorati tags: New Year, 2007, Personal, Resolutions, Life, Thoughts, Emo, Pessimism, Optimism, Hope, Blogging

Britney Following Madonna's Footsteps?

2006-12-30T23:25:00.000+05:30

I found a rather weird story down at StyleIkon blog. At first, I thought it was some kind of joke. Britney Spears is adopting a child who was affected by the 2004 tsunami tragedy. Read about it here. I googled, and indeed, found a few entries on it. I would link to one of the results, but I happen to hate Perez Hilton for some unknown, mysterious reason. I'll just link you to a google search on it.

So anyway, human morals have hit such a low that adoptions are done to stay in the spotlight. Apparently Britneys break up, and the cootchie shots that followed haven't done her "reputation" any good. So she decided to go the Madonna way and build some. And lets not forget, Jolie and Pitt like to take back home souvenirs in the name of adoption from every foreign land they step on.

Celebrities are obviously ignorant of the fact that inter-racial adoptions are a sensitive thing. It's almost impossible, unless you're willing to change yourself and give up being selfish (which obviously Britney is not willing. See the next paragraph). I mean, who would want a stripp... whor... slu...bitc... err... lets just say controversial... Who would want a controversial step mom? Imagine... the kid wakes up one day, turns on the TV and finds his step mom flashing cootchies to the paparazzi.

“Britney’s had a turbulent year and wants 2007 to be brilliant. As well as wanting to look after her would be adopted child, she is determined to make a music comeback with a difference,” quoted a source. The "unbold" text can be ignored.

And interestingly, Britney's would-be-child is named Wang. Hmm.

Technorati tags: Britney Spears, Britney, Celebrity, Gossip, News, Entertainment, Adoption, Madonna, Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt, Brangelina, Tsunami, Children, Stupid, Crazy, WTF

And The Oscar Goes To...

2006-12-29T23:45:00.000+05:30

.... Mamata Banerjee. It was a tough decision, with the Indian Prime Minister and West Bengal Chief, Mr. Bhattacharjee running close behind. Its always a close decision when it comes to deciding the Indian politician with the best gimmick. Yet, Mamata Banerjee managed to slip past the others. What Banerjee had that the others didn't in their gimmick, was the way Mahatma Gandhi's non-violent methodology was misused.

A 25 day long fast, and a dramatic hospitalization was enough to guarantee Banerjee the politician with the best gimmick award for 2006. Seriously now, is it possible to stay alive without food for a month? Unless one can live off of their fat, like a camel, it isn't possible. Maybe that's what Banerjee did all these days, live off of her excess fat. And still, she looks like a pumpkin that one would crave for Halloween.

From the 'protesting-and-standing-up-for-the-poor' act, and right to the hospitalization, its the role any Indian politician would long for. I mean, what else would get you more votes that suckering the poor into believing that you actually care for their cause? After all, the farm lands in this West Bengal area is so infertile that the poor buggers shouldn't be allowed to be paid compensation, or better yet, be employed by the industry that is taking over the lands. If that happened, who would vote for you when the fools get enlightened, both monetarily and intellectually?

Apparently, she has "evidence" that the farmers' lands were taken by force. Yet, it hasn't been presented. She had been protesting for 25 days, but not a single evidence was presented. And now that she is hospitalized, I wouldn't be surprised if this drama slowly mellows down and fades away from the public memory - the public has a very short memory, like not even 64 MB - or if it takes a new twist, like most soap operas do. After all, it looks like a political theatric gone awry. What interests me more is the food that Mamata would have had secretly, during those long "bathroom breaks".

Technorati tags: Politics, India, Gimmick, Mamata Banerjee, West Bengal, Tata, Tata Motors, Fasting, Rants, WTF, Political Bullshit

Christmas Message for Osama

2006-12-28T23:10:00.000+05:30

José Ramos Horta, East Timor's Prime Minister, took the spirit to a whole new level, when he wished Osama bin Laden a Merry Christmas. A Nobel Peace Prize winner he may be, but there is a fine line between "good will" and insanity.

Said the PM of East Timor, "I have no illusions that my message will achieve any change, but I thought that here I had a chance that Osama bin Laden would listen and maybe, just maybe, my message would touch his conscience." ..... And I thought Saddam had cracked the greatest joke of the year (see previous post).

Wonder what Osama has to say to that. I bet he hates Christmas, if anything, for he always seems to end up in Santa's "bad boy" list.

Technorati tags: Humor, Hilarious, Christmas, Santa, East Timor, Jose Ramos Horta, Humour, Funny, LOL, ROFL, Osama bin Laden, Osama, bin Laden

RIP Saddam

2006-12-28T22:13:00.000+05:30

And finally, Saddam's death sentence gets the approval. Now, there's just too many people talking about the "consequences" that may arise if he is hanged. Even people who don't know much about whats going on join in on the "debate", just to get some publicity (I'm tempted to link to a few of them, but hey, I'm a nice guy who's not looking for trouble, atleast for now. I got changes to implement around this place ya know). That's just pathetic, and these publicity whores should be hanged as well.

Okay, coming back to the topic at hand. Saddam is a great humorist. Even as he is staring at death's face, he cracks a joke. The Human Rights people and the "Watchdog Group" aren't short of jokes either. And India has something funny to add to the occasion as well.

Putting all these jokers behind our back, don't you think most people are kind of going soft on the bugger? For someone who has killed so many innocent people, does he really deserve a soft spot? It seems most of today's politicians are tiny balled idiotas, starting from the Indian Prime Minister. Politicians and Human Rights people both, pursuing their narrow, unenlightened self interest, piss me off.

While politicians need errr... things for their country from Iraq, and don't want to create the least bit of animosity, the Human Rights people want... what else? Publicity. I'm yet to see any Human Rights people fighting for any cause that might not make it past the second page of a newspaper. I can't help but imagine a hypothetical situation now. Imagine if bin Laden is caught, would the Human Rights people try to kiss his ass in the name of "Human Rights" to get some cheap publicity? You, as well as I know the answer.

** RIP = Rot In the Pits.

Technorati tags: Saddam, Saddam Hussein, Hussein, Bush, Politics, Iraq, America, Terrorism, Middle East, War on Terror, Capital Punishment, Execution, Human Rights, Watchdog, Rants

Warne's 700 And Quality of Cricket

2006-12-27T11:47:00.000+05:30

Recently, there have been many criticisms on how the quality of cricket has gone down. That the quality of batting and bowling has dropped because of the flat pitches. And then you have a player like Shane Warne, who recently broke the 700 test wickets barrier. And Shaun Pollock had crossed the elite 400 wickets club just a few weeks before.

A few years back, there were only about three or four bowlers who had 400+ wickets in tests. Today, there are 10, with five of them having surpassed 500+ wickets. Batting wise, it took Sachin Tendulkar a long time to surpass Sunil Gavaskar's record of most runs in tests, and now we have five batsmen with 10,000+ runs and two more poised to join the elite club in a couple of years.

Yes, I agree the number of matches played in a calendar year has increased significantly nowadays. But with this increase, the expectations have gone high and so has the competitive nature of the game. You no more see a bowler applauding a glorious straight drive from the batsman, as used to be the case 15 years ago. Nowadays, bowlers give a cold, mean stare if anything. They aren't short for words either, with sledging slowly becoming acceptable.

It's the same story with one day cricket. All of a sudden, the 10,000 run mark doesn't seem unsurmountable, with 5 batsmen reaching there within a span of a short time.Rahul Dravid and Ricky Ponting are poised to reach there very soon as well. In ODI bowling, the 300 wicket club isn't a rarity anymore. With such a fast development of the shorter version of the game in such short time, one can imagine what the future of Twenty20 internationals would be like.

So, as far as I can see, cricket hasn't degraded a bit. In fact, its quite the opposite. Cricketing technique and standards have risen sharply, especially the fielding aspect. Gone are the days when fielders used to accompany the ball to the fence. Now you have fielders who dive like goalkeepers and stop the ball on a dime. The batsmen have to work really hard for the runs, and they are in fact doing that very well. Only the best of the lot last long to reach the top.

Technorati tags: Shane Warne, Shaun Pollock, Australia, South Africa, Rahul Dravid, Sachin Tendulkar, India, Cricket, Sports, Test Match, Twenty20

Sex Education at 19: Part II

2006-12-25T23:53:00.000+05:30

The last time my dad tried to enlighten me about the "facts of life", it was funny. He made another attempt today, and it was even funnier! Okay, let me get to the details of what happened.

I accompanied my dad to the library today. I wanted to start reading again. It had been quite a while since I was laying off the good stuff. Now, I'm usually into action adventure books. The ones where terrorists always get their ass kicked, and where the good always prevail over evil. I know, I have a good taste . So anyway, I was checking out a Tom Clancy book on computers, and a book by Frederick Forsyth. Along comes my dad, snooping around to see what I was checking out.

He pretended to be checking out the books in the top shelf, but I knew he was spying on me as well. This went on for about two minutes. And then all of a sudden, like the coming of the Lord (you know what I'm saying?), he pops a book in my face and tells me "Try this one! This is an awesome book, I've read it myself!" I'm like woah, and move back a little so I could see the cover of the book. I was almost in splits when I saw it.

It was a book by James Hadley Chase, known for err... racy stuff in his books. The cover had a stripper chick, just like the one here (I couldn't find the exact cover image of that particular book), but only had lesser clothes. There he was, attempting to help me teach the "facts of life". I somehow managed to turn down the book, and promised to check it out the next time I was at the library, all the while trying REALLY hard not to laugh. I already get enough lessons on the "facts of life" on the internet, and on the terrorist books I read (my dad doesn't snoop on the insides of the books I read, just the titles).

On the way back home, he was telling me how stupid it was of me to turn down that book, and how a "page turner" the book was. I just couldn't control myself, I HAD to laugh my ass off. But I didn't. It was a Herculian effort, believe me. From time to time, I pretended to scratch my nose (and thereby concealing my mouth) when a smile crept up, which probably could have turned into a "LMAO!" any second. Then he talked about the other books he had read, like Sidney Sheldons'. I couldn't wait to get home!

I can go on to eternity bitching about how education, especially sex education sucks in the country. But I guess I've already done enough in the previous post on sex education. It's probably God's way of having fun, seeing older and already-enlightened kids trying to be taught... stuff by their worried parents. Seeing parents "having a talk" with an 18+ year old is indeed funny.

Technorati tags: Education, Sex Education, Funny, Humor, Books, Personal, Life, LOL, ROFL

Merry Christmas and Ms. USA

2006-12-24T23:53:00.000+05:30

First of all, wish all of you (regular readers and those passing by) a Merry Christmas. Hopefully, you haven't managed to get into Santa's "bad list". And now, moving on to news with greater importance (hey, I'm just taking a page out of the media's book). I just read somewhere that Ms. USA was teenage drinker and a drug abuser, and another one, Ms. Nevada has a lesbian fantasy. The word lesbian interested me, and led me to discover the drama that followed. If you're slower than me, and don't know what this is all about, read this.

Since when did Ms. Universes/Worlds/USAs/Timbuktu/Whatever become role models anyway? For all I've seen, they make tall claims and promises about fighting for poverty and education's cause if they win, but turn out to be an everyday cheap whore. Aishwarya Rai, Sushmita Sen and now, Miss USA... they're all the same.

The point I'm trying to make is, why hype up these chicks when they turn out to be "ordinary" sluts? Why call them a role model? All this Ms. Title shows turn out to be just a showcasing of hot chicks with nice racks. Not that I don't drool over them, but the unnecessary hype and publicity pisses me off. Isn't the media coverage a little over the top? What do you think?

Technorati tags: Miss USA,
Miss Kentucky, Miss Nevada, Katie Rees, Tara Conner, Donald Trump, Celebrity, Celebrities, Entertainment, News, Pageant, Girls, Whore, Bitch, Lesbian, WTF

Sue Your Way to the Bank

2006-12-22T11:48:00.000+05:30

I love the United States of America for two reasons. One, even a loser like me can get hot chicks. It's pretty easy, especially if you have a weird accent. Two, you can become rich overnight. Or atleast take your best shot in becoming one. And no, its not the casino route. Its probably one of the easiest ways of making money. It's the new S word. Sue! Its also the new L word, lawsuit.

In the USA, you can sue anyone for pretty much anything! And you'll probably win, or atleast get a settlement. I've heard pretty funny lawsuits filed in the US of A, including a couple filing a lawsuit against a Hotel for bed bug bites. And for how much? $ 20 million. Ahahah! The latest attempts to the "get rich quick" routine have been made by Evil Knievel and Mariah Carey.

I bet by now, Kanye West is wishing he never made that damned "Touch The Sky" video. First, it lost the Best Video prize at the European VMA. A defeat that he didn't accept err... sportingly. If you remember, he said the video "cost a million dollars; Pamela Anderson was in it; I was jumping across canyons." Indeed. Money + Pamela + Boobs + Canyons = Genius! Okay, back to the story. It seems Evil Knievel is as impressed by his video as the VMA judges.

Knievel is suing the rapper for impersonating him in the video. A bad imitation, I might add. We all know Evil Knievel is not an ideal hero for kids, since his canyon jumping antics have more than likely caused many imprudent brats to tumble headfirst off their bikes in copycat stunts gone awry. But after witnessing Kanye's sore-loser behavior, we must admit Knievel is a better role model than "Kanyevel", because a busted head is better than a swollen one.

Moving on to Mariah. The diva thinks, after selling about a gazillion albums worldwide, that she might be confused with Marey Carey, an adult film actress and a wannabe governor. The diva is suing Mary in an attempt to prevent Mary from copyrighting her name. Another attempt at misusing the Copyright policy. So says Mary's lawyer, "My first thought was, does Mariah Carey realize what her lawyer is comparing her to and are they seriously concerned? Do they seriously think the fans are going to be confused?" The guy's got a point. If Mariah is so worried that she might be confused with a porn star, maybe she should lay off from those skimpy clothes and weird Barbie hair extensions.

I believe these two women should settle this maturely. A pay-per-view mud wrestling perhaps. Oh well, thats my imagination running wild. But after seeing lawsuits being filed for really stupid things, I feel really encouraged to move the USA and sue random people I meet. And with the money, I would get the ever out-of-reach hot chicks .

Technorati tags: Mariah Carey, Evil Knievel, Celebrity, Celebrities, Entertainment, Humor, Lawsuit, Kanye West, Humour, Mary Carey, Porn Star

419 Eater

2006-12-21T23:00:00.000+05:30

Don't those Nigerian emails that ask for your bank account or credit card number annoy the hell out of you? I know it does to me. No matter how many email ID's I keep blocking, no matter how much "smart" filters I apply, those damned emails somehow slip through. It pisses me off. It obviously pisses you off too (unless you somehow manage to derive pleasure out of them). But there is a solution. A different kind of solution.

Most of us just let them piss us off, and send that damned email to the trash. And the process goes on everytime it happens. That's so old school. Here's where 419Eater comes in. "What's that?", you ask? 419Eater is a community of rookie and professional scambaiters. "Scambaiting, simply put, you enter into a dialogue with scammers, simply to waste their precious time and resources. Whilst you are doing this, you will be helping to keep the scammers away from real potential victims and screwing around with the minds of deserving thieves", says the website.

It is a good concept, wasting the time of scamsters and thereby, minimizing their scams. The idea would succeed if a large number of people participate in scambaiting. Read their FAQ's to find out more about scambaiting. It is actually fun, screwing around with scamsters. Especially the Nigerian ones. Instead of wasting your time on some worthless crap on the internet (like MySpace), you could spend a little time screwing around with scamsters and help minimize scam victims. You'd be serving a good cause to the ever growing internet community. I've joined in on the fun, have you?

Technorati tags: 419, Scam, Spam, Fraud, Crime, Phishing, Internet, Scams, Nigeria, 419Eater

Weird Email

2006-12-20T22:27:00.000+05:30

I got a weird email yesterday, about linking to a certain blog. The email provided a link to the blog, which I obviously clicked. It appeared to be an anti-terrorism, anti-Arab and anti-Semitism blog. Well, actually extremist. Here's part of the email:

Hi. My name is Hot Secretary (name changed, obviously). Perhaps we have met online, but more probably you don't know me from Adam. I monitor blogs for [insert extremely stupid blog title here], and came across your post.

........

Obadiah - an anonymous Israeli politician - writes extremely controversial articles about Israel, the Middle East politics, and terrorism.
Shoher is equally critical of Jewish and Muslim myths, and advocates political rationalism instead of moralizing.

........

Please help us spread Obadiah's message, and mention the blog in one of your posts, or link to us from slimspeare.blogspot.com. I would greatly appreciate your comments.

Best Wishes,
Hot Secretary.

The contents of the blog was more in the lines of "Muslims suck!", "All muslims should be shot" and "Islam preaches terrorism ARGH!" etc. The author chose to be polite only in a few places. I did some research on the "anonymous" author, and the blog itself. Turns out they have had their blog banned several times before. But the author wouldn't quit being an asshole, and would make new ones. The author even wrote a book about his views on Jews and Muslims, but Amazon banned the reviews and lifted his book from their site. Google banned their directory listing, and their presence from AdWords.

Two things went through my mind after all this. One, I came so close to meeting/talking/chatting/emailing whatever with an Extremist asshole. Or atleast his secretary (hopefully, a hot one). Imagine an anti-Jew from Israel. Two, take a look at the bold text in the quote from the email I recieved. The secretary, or whoever came across one of my posts obviously thought I was err... extremist on the Extremists too. Maybe they thought I was anti-Muslim when I bitched about terrorists. The question I want to ask you readers is: Do I sound Extremist/anti-Islam? Hopefully not.

And about linking to that blog, only if the secretary sleeps with me. Ahahah. Actually, no. I don't support extremist views. I sent a reply. I tried to be as polite as possible, yet let them know I was waving my middle finger at them. The reply was more in the lines of "Fuck you, Hot Secretary. Though I agree about the anti-terrorism part of your blog, everything else is total bullshit. How about... [CENSORED]." But the reply was polite on the outside .

Now I'm worried they'll come after my ass for being err... indirectly impolite. I wish they remain their ignorant self and blog about stupid things. That way, it won't cause a Universal imbalance. And my ass would be safe too.

Technorati tags: Terrorism, Israel, Politics, Islam, Weird, Anti-Semitism, Jews, Anti-Islam, Stupid

Announcement

2006-12-19T23:47:00.000+05:30

Ah, the little changes that I want to make on this blog, I've been testing them out for the past few days. It's coming along okay, except for some hair pulling moments now and then. I'm rolling out the changes on this blog little by little, so you might (actually, will) run across some screwed areas of the layout. Sidebar and comments, for example. If you notice any problem, please inform me. I have so little time to test the codes and roll out new changes, so any bug notices will be greatly appreciated.

Regular posting will start from tomorrow (hopefully), which means I'm almost back to bore you all to death... again.

P.S: Cap, are you able to comment now?

Pwnage at its Best

2006-12-15T22:42:00.000+05:30

I wish I were there to witness this pwnage...

And I'm making a few changes to the blog (title, some parts of the layout etc.), so y'all have to be contended with lame ass pics, like this one, for a few more days. Maybe weeks, I don't know... because changes coupled with procrastination and cricket matches equals lack of time to post. I'm too lazy to even tag this post, so I'll just do it later. Goodnight readers *yawn*.

Bloglebrity

2006-12-12T23:48:00.000+05:30

"The post title is quite odd", you probably thought. It's supposed to mean "a famous, well known person in the Blogosphere". Probably a combination of the words "blogger" and "celebrity". Wicked imagination indeed. Kineda's widget will tell you what list of bloglebrity you fall under. It uses information provided by Technorati.com to calculate your "fame". So what are you waiting for? Go check under what list you fall under!

Although it says I'm a B-List bloglebrity (high authority group), it is kind of hard to believe. Though I have about 170 links to my blog, I don't consider myself "famous". I'm more like a Paris Hilton or a Nicole Ritchie - although they have a high rank in Celebsville, they're talentless and plain stupid. Not that I'm calling myself stupid and talentless, nor did I like the comparison I just made (ugh). It's just that I don't have tons of readers. Anyway, it feels good to be almost at the top of the food chain. The only way to climb up the list is to have legal links to your blog. Loads of them. So if you are interested in a link exchange, just contact me. We underrated bloggers need to help each other to climb up to the top. I'd love to be at the top, have tons of readers and comments, loads of compliments and hot chicks dying to sleep with me! Don't you? Which sane blogger wouldn't wish for those???

Technorati tags: Blog, Celebrity, Bloglebrity, Fame, Technorati, Links, Link Exchange

How to Insult a Geek

2006-12-11T23:49:00.000+05:30

The art of insulting is quite an err.... art. Not everyone can master it. Nor can it be taught. It takes quite a creativity to actually offend someone. Like, you insult a terrorist by calling him a camel driver, or a sand nigger. Call a Mexican gangster puto, and you'll have him point his gun (the actual weapon, AhEm...) in your face. Call an emo a emo, and you'll have them crying immediately. Actually, you can call them anything. They'll cry anyway. But, how do you insult a nerd/geek (like me), who are super intelligent and don't fall for the stereotype "faggot", "bitch" and "asshole"? This cute chick in the picture tells you how...

Ahahah! I just got pwned!

Technorati tags: Humor, Funny, Pic, Insult, Humour, Geek, Terrorist, Emo, Art of Insulting

Indian Men Unhappy

2006-12-10T23:41:00.000+05:30

Back in school, I used to learn in Civics classes (thats political science classes for you Americans) about the diversity in our country. Now, this article takes that "diversity" to a whole new level. "Indian men are unhappy", says the article. Well, this article made me happy, in the sense that I know I'm not alone in contending with the agony of "the sizes".

"Mr Puri said that since Indians would be embarrassed about going to a chemist to ask for smaller condoms there should be vending machines dispensing different sizes all around the country", the article says half way through. Yeah right. But what about the guy standing behind me in the queue (line/row for you Americans) watching over my shoulder?

"It's not size, it's what you do with it that matters. From our population, the evidence is Indians are doing pretty well," the article quotes Sunil Mehta, the editor of Maxim, as saying. Indeed. Maybe we did it a bit too well; our population is all set to overtake China by 2050. And now, moving onto stories of lesser significance. Saddam Hussein and Mohammed Afzal are yet to be hanged, by which we're sending wrong signals to the Extremists that we're actually terrorized by their acts. While Shibu Soren got axed from the ministry and will probably be hanged, Navjot Sidhu - a cricketer turned politician - has been found guilty of homicide.

Technorati tags: Humor, Funny, Condoms, Weird, Small Penis, Humour, India, Politics, Homicide

Blue Screen Stuff

2006-12-09T23:28:00.000+05:30

Okay, so its that time of the night when you are bored to death and have nothing to do. Until Super Slim (look! Up in the air... its a bird! It's a plane! No, its just a moron with a stupid blog post.) comes along and rescues you from the evil clutches of boredom. Today, Super Slim has for you a few Blue Screen of Death goodies. If you aren't yet enlightened about the Blue Screen, read my previous post. If you're still confused, go away. This post is not for you. Go drool over the picture in my last post.

The notorious Blue Screen has been the subject of many easter eggs (not related to the easter bunny). Lots of video games have easter eggs based on the Blue Screen. Startopia for example, and the famous SWAT 4.

Check out this totally hilarious Intel commercial! In fact, the Blue Screen of Death has been an inspiritation to coining new similar corny terms, like the Red Screen of Death, White Screen of Impatience, Spinning Beachball of Death, Spinning Pizza of Death etc.

The Blue Screen did not spare even Mr. Gates, as you can see from this video. Pretty embarassing. Internet Explorer has a pretty cool easter egg on the Blue Screen. Just type in "about:mozilla" in the address bar and hit go (Only IE 5.x or later). If that doesn't work, its probably because you were an idiot and typed it along with the quotes, or you have Service Pack 2. If that doesn't work, type res://mshtml.dll/about.moz in the address bar and hit go. You'll see a blue blank page. This is IE making fun of Mozilla. If you have Firefox installed, type in about:mozilla, hit go and see if you can decrypt the "biblical" message that appears.

The BSoD has attained so much "popularity" that Microsoft has it as an official screensaver! It is even the subject of bored nerds who have nothing good to blog about (like me), as can be seen here. And finally, there is a huge gallery of hilarious instances of the BSoD.

That is all I have on the BSoD... for now. Like this post or hate it, I killed atleast 10 minutes of your boredom, and therefore deserve a cookie.

Technorati tags: Blue Screen, Blue Screen of Death, Windows, Microsoft, Funny, Easter Egg, BSoD, Boredom

Sexy Blue Screen

2006-12-08T23:38:00.000+05:30

The Blue Screen, Microsoft's version of Satan, the leading cause of suicide in geekdom, was much dreaded by computer nerds like me. But this blue screen, I'd love to stare at for hours .

Woo! Okay, I've got plenty of fun stuff on the Blue Screen I can write about. But I don't have the time right now. I'll do it tomorrow. Watch out for the fun post, and make sure you're bored to death, because there's going to be plenty of easter eggs and fun stuff to do. Now, I'm going to stare at that picture for some time.

Technorati tags: Blue Screen, Microsoft, Windows, Humor, Funny, Pic, Picture, Sexy, Humour

Topless Car Wash

2006-12-07T23:40:00.000+05:30

I would love to stumble across one, if I could. But being the pervert that I am, I think I'd take a raincheck on that one... keep reading to find out why.

Technorati tags: Humor, Funny, Video, Car Wash, Humour, ROFL, LMAO

Weird Dreams

2006-12-06T23:03:00.000+05:30

Lately, I've been having pretty weird and supernatural dreams. It all started with the weird ass alien-in-the-rooftop dream I had a few months ago (read it here). You would notice my writing is pretty much different from what it is now... that was a few months ago. Astonishing how ones writing style can change soon. Okay, back to the point. I've had some more of supernatural dreams, some having aliens in them. It's pretty weird... I'm starting to think these actually have some kind of message in them. Like some supernatural power is trying to communicate with me (psssh, don't laugh!).

The recent two dreams I had have been the weirdest yet. And scariest. I'll start with yesterday's dream. I was with some chick in the beach. It was after midnight, and there was no moonlight. So obviously, it was dark. And for some reason, I was seeing myself in third person. We were running from something, I don't know what something was, but we were running from it. And thats how we ended up in the beach. We decided to "hide" in the beach. This part is pretty funny, because there was nothing in the beach where we could hide. Maybe it was the darkness we decided to use to our advantage. So anyway, when we were sure that we had lost whatever that was chasing us, the chick lighted a match. She was pretty scared, and we looked around, it was high tide. The matchstick ran out, and it was dark again. She lighted another match... and horror. I had disappeared, and in my place was this scary alien dude, with big black eyes (exactly like the one in the picture, but only sideways. And he wasn't that skinny). The glow of the match reflected in its eyes, and the chick let out a scream and I jumped out of my bed, confused and scared.

I'm really not sure what this dream intended to mean. Maybe that I'm actually an alien? That would explain why I'm different from most people, and why chicks don't dig me. But no. Somehow I think there is a deeper message in that dream.

And then I had another weird dream. It was today, early morning. Me and one of my pals were driving in the countryside, and it was midnight (in the dream). We were discussing something, don't know what (probably hot women). The highway was deserted, and it was eerie out there. So we're riding right.... and riding and riding and riding and riding. Its a long ride, and even I was starting to get pissed off in the real world (somehow I was able to figure out I was dreaming!). Then all of a sudden, my friend starts to talk as if he had a gag over his mouth. It sounded real weird, and scary. Now, I was trembling and was in half a mind to jump out of the car and just run away (pretty weird how you get such silly ideas in the dream world). But I decided not to. I kept asking him what was wrong. I couldn't exactly make out what he was trying to say, but made out the words "blue" and "mountain". He was pointing towards the little mountain that had suddenly appeared out of nowhere, to our right. I peered in the direction he was pointing to... and I thought I saw something. Then it was there again, a scary and eerie blue light - the size of two stars - disappearing behind the mountain. Even I started to mumble like my friend at this point. *Poof* I was awake, my heart was beating fast and I was pretty sure I was mumbling the same thing in my sleep too.

I know it might sound really hilarious to those reading this, but I'm convinced there is some deep meaning to all of this. And I still get the shivers thinking about the dreams. And its almost midnight. I wonder whats in store for tonight. Hmm.

Technorati tags: Supernatural, Paranormal, UFO, Aliens, Alien, Dream, Dreams, Personal, Weird

"Annoying" Can Be Fun

2006-12-03T22:28:00.000+05:30

Some time last week, I had blogged about the annoying website I came across. Today, I accidently stumbled across a spoof of that on YouTube. So I got a little curious, and searched for more... and guess what? I found some good spoof (or is it spoofs?) of BadgerBadgerBadger. I guess annoying things can be fun after all!

Badger spoof(s?) have become a kind of cult club with more and more users responding to the annoying animation. Here are some of my favorites. Hopefully, you have a lot of time at hand and are bored to death, so you can watch all of these videos.

Check out this neat little animation. Must have taken him/her a while to make this. And what more, its so "famous" that it has become a post-dinner family activity, with fathers asking their sons to act it out! These guys obviously had a lot of time at hand to act out this hilarious spoof. I don't know why this one is called a GeoBadger, but it sure close to the sillyness of the original version. "Hmm, how much more silly could it possibly get?", you're probably wondering. As silly as doing the Badger dance at the airport! Now thats hilarious! And here's a stuffed doll version.

Out of all these, two stood out. Check this little girls reaction, totally hilarious! And weird laugh too... She does quite an imitation too! And finally, the Live Action Badger is probably the best spoof of all!

If you still have a lot of time at hand and are bored to death, check out YouTube for more. More and more Badger spoof(s?) are being posted there everyday.

Technorati tags: BadgerBadgerBadger, Spoof, Parody, Humor, Funny, Entertainment, Video, YouTube, Humour, Videos, ROFL, LMAO

Finally, Some Sanity Prevails

2006-12-01T21:21:00.000+05:30

I'm actually surprised that some sanity prevailed in the prosecution of Shibu Soren, the politician. Its probably the first time in Indian politics that power wasn't misused in hindering the legal process. For the first time, I did not look at the front page of the newspaper and go "WTF????"

Good stuff. But one thing I can't believe. Okay, actually two. One, this idiot was still kept in power though he had a major murder case against him. How the hell did the Prime Minister trust this bugger and put him in the council of ministers, I guess its like one of those universal questions that will never be answered. And along with this story, was this piece of story. So it was kind of a double delight for me, seeing that some sanity is prevailing in the country's legal process, and powers are not being misused.

Oh, and the second thing that I could not believe... what's that you ask? Take a good look at this pic, and tell me how one cannot say that this moron is a freaking psycho??? He looks like a terrorist! Does it even require a legal process to have the slightest doubt that this moron is actually a murderer? If you think no, then maybe I'm psychic and probably read his psychopathic mind.

Technorati tags: Politics, India, Government, Indian Government, Shibu Soren, Murder, Crime, Legal, Law

Winamp Remote

2006-11-29T17:40:00.000+05:30

I finally got time to update my Winamp. The new version has some cool new features. There's a better iPod support, and then there's this dashboard area in the Media Library which contains an overview of most items in the Library, like most played tracks, SHOUTcast and some Winamp services.

But what stood out was Winamp Remote. This neat feature lets you listen to the music in your Winamp library from anywhere! Thats right, anywhere! All you need is to download this little program and install it. Whenever you want to access your music library from a web browser, you just have to have this program open, and your account signed in. When you want to access your music, just sign into Orb and... start listening! It's still in beta, but it works like a charm already!

Just imagine, you're on a long vacation, and forgot to take the iPod battery charger with you. Or you don't even have an iPod or any portable music player. This is an ideal solution for music addicts (like me). The only requirements for this to work is that little program you downloaded is running, and your internet not getting disconnected (and provided that your firewall/anti virus program wouldn't be a bastard). Oh, and there are the power outages. Provided you aren't in a shit hole country like India, where power outages and frequent internet disconnections are a way of life, Winamp Remote is an ideal solution to stay in touch with your music when you're away from home.

Technorati tags: Winamp, mp3, Music, Technology, Software, Winamp, Media, Orb, Winamp Remote

Commies Shood Laern Engalish

2006-11-28T23:30:00.000+05:30

Need I say more?

P.S: I know the new comment box is a little buggy. I will fix it tomorrow.

Technorati tags: Commies, China, Communists, Humor, Funny, Humour, Pic

Home Alone

2006-11-27T23:14:00.000+05:30

It's every persons dream. Being home alone. And I am, for 3 days! Even though I have some extra shit to do around the house, and it's probably going to take my time from blogging, I'm excited. Mainly because I can walk naked around the house, sleep naked, watch TV naked, blog naked. In short, I can be naked the whole day! No one can explain the feeling of pride you get when you just walk around the house naked all day. Jennifer Aniston once did it in Friends. I envy the nudists, especially those who get to see naked chicks. I think I'll mov.... wait a minute.... what's that? Uh oh, someone's at the door...

Technorati tags: Home Alone, Fun, Personal, Life, Fantasy, Naked, Nude, Naturists, nudists

Funny Video

2006-11-26T22:50:00.000+05:30

Why do dumbass people do what they shouldn't be doing? Is it because they're dumb? We should hurl all the dumbass people up, and put them on an island, like this dumb guy...

This guy lets his gun fly out of his hands and hit him right in the melon.

Technorati tags: Video, Humor, Funny, Humour, Dumbass, Redneck, ROFL, LMAO

Self Image

2006-11-24T23:24:00.000+05:30

Me in 10 years. Ahahahah, I can't help but pity myself.

Technorati tags: I, am, Desperate, Humor, Humour, Funny, Pic, ROFL

My New Ambition

2006-11-23T21:42:00.000+05:30

I've always wanted to be a computer programmer, and maybe a stand up comedian like Kramer. But after reading this news, I want to be become an airport security guard. I will KILL to fulfil this ambition. Hey, where else besides being a porno movie director do you get to see a lot of live boobies? That's what I thought until I read the last paragraph. Bummer.

I would definitely like to be on the other end of this "body scanner" though. It's not like I wouldn't lie to the security chick about the hot guy with long ding dongs, and it's not like she would figure out I'm bullshitting and miss it in the name of work ethics. But problem would arise when I want to travel abroad. I wouldn't want anyone to notice my gun, however small it may be. I know, I'm a terrorist in a sense. I'll have to travel by boat, I guess. Hopefully not in the Titanic. This is one time I wished technology didn't grow at the pace that it is growing. Actually, I wish my ding dong was bigger, so I could walk across the security checkpoint, with my crotch high in the air, saying things like "Hey! How're ya doing?!" and "Who's got a flag?".

Technorati tags: Airport, Terrorism, Terrorist, Security, Technology, Body Scanner, Funny, Weird, Privacy, Ding Dong

Annoying

2006-11-22T23:53:00.000+05:30

This is the most annoying thing I've come across in my 19 years of existence. More annoying than Paris Hilton, ghostriding, and James Bond movies. The purpose of that website escapes me. Why don't you check it out and try to guess its purpose?

Warning: The website might make you pull your hair out, kick your monitor and go on a psychopathic rampage.

Technorati tags: Annoying, Internet, Stupid, Weird, WTF, Holy Shit, AhEm

Kramer is a Racist

2006-11-21T21:19:00.000+05:30

... and a cracker ass. LOL! He is probably one of the worst stand up comedians in the history of... stand up comedy. Can't even handle hecklers properly. But he is funny as hell even when he is cracking up! ROFL! This is the best video. Ever!

Technorati tags: Michael Richards, Kramer, Seinfeld, Racist, Racism, Funny, Cracker Ass, Stand up Comedy

A Mighty (Pain in the Ass) Heart

2006-11-21T21:06:00.000+05:30

Jolie and Pitt are in the country, but guess who is grabbing all the attention? Their bodyguards. First, it was a British photographer who was at the receiving end. Now, its muslim students of a school in South Mumbai and their parents. Click here to read all about it. It's proof bodyguards are all brawns and no brains. Talking shit about people in their territory, bad idea. I mean, it's like going to Afghanistan and calling the Taliban "towelheads!". Ain't no way you're coming back without just one leg, one and a half hands and half a head.

Perhaps the attention-whore nature of their bodyguards led Brangelina decide to torture anoth... I mean adopt an Indian kid. Celebrities always want to be in the news, don't they? So, they decide its time to add another one into the already existing line up of adopted foreign kids, one from Ethiopia and one from Cambodia. And guess what? They've already decided the name of their would be adopted kid, even before they've seen the child. They're going to call the new comer "India", after its country of origin. Wow. How original.

Celebrities think these children are some kind of souvenirs or something. It's like: Go film a movie in a foreign land, get publicity, get a living souvenir in the name of (a high profile) adoption. Go to another foreign land, repeat process. When are these self righteous celebrities going to realize inter-racial adoptions are a sensitive thing (Psst Madonna, this goes double for you)? Will these children survive the sudden change in enviroment? Why are celebrities attention whores? Where's the Lithium? Argh!

Technorati tags: Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt, Brangelina, Adoptions, A Mighty Heart, India, Gossip, Entertainment, Celebrity, Celebrities, Movies, Rants, Dumb Bodyguards

Eye of the Slim

2006-11-20T17:39:00.000+05:30

I've had an eye infection for the past week, and so I had to put the blog on hiatus. I looked like a Chinese dude, slant eyed, with satan red eyes two days into the infection. All I did was lie on my bed and listen to music. As if that wasn't enough, the infection spread to my dad. That meant we had to eat lousy and bland food for a few days. And my aunt expired two days ago, so we had to travel six hours with the red and watery eyes. People were staring at me as if I were a modern biological terrorist or something. It's been quite a week, the past seven days (I know, I have a bad sense of humor). So anyway, now that my eyes have healed a bit, I'm back to talk shit on things and bore the hell out of you people.

Technorati tags: Personal, Life, Family

Ass, You Like It

2006-11-12T23:48:00.000+05:30

Oh. And if you're wondering too much about the title, its a Shakespeare knock off.

Technorati tags: Bin Laden, Osama Bin Laden, Terrorism, Shit, Humor, Humour, Funny, Pic, ROFL, LMAO

Kindergarten Sex Education

2006-11-11T21:23:00.000+05:30

If you thought Diddy's vaginal dryness problem was the funniest thing you've heard in a while, then check out this story.

In a country dominated by stupid politicians and moronic people, that was certainly missing. Well, not anymore. Now we're going to have five year old kids talking about marijuana and bangin' dem hoes. A perfect addition to an already fucked up country. And I thought kindergarten is where you learn the alphabets and numbers...

I'm jealous of the little bastards now. I didn't get to see pictures of boobies and pussy when I was five. Heck, forget five, even when I was 13 - 14. I asked my dad about sex. I asked, "Pop, where do babies come from?" and he slapped me slightly, "Aye! Why do you wanna know?" and I go, "'Cause I'm 18!". We won't be having that kind of a conversation in Indian households anymore. Perhaps the kids can teach their parents stuff they didn't know! That would be a first. Kids teaching parents about sex. Hey, atleast we're one up on the rest of the world. Where else would you find a kindergarten goer talking about sex, in the coming years?

For morons (because there is always one nearby) who didn't get my message, I find this move stupid. This move is probably the resultant of teachers feeling "embarassed" talking about sex to teenagers. One day, we have parents trying to "have a talk" to their already sex educated (by self, of course) child, and the next, we have 5 years olds talking sex and drugs. Everyone calls George Bush a moron. What would they call the person who came up with this idea?

Then again, I might as well befriend the little fucker in my neighborhood. I might learn something new, browsing through his sex education textbook.

Source:
Stumbled upon - Ekawaaz's blog.
Real news - Reuters news.

Technorati tags: Sex Education, Education, Morons, Idiots, Humor, Kindergarten, Drugs, Humour, Silly, Stupid

A Lame Knock Knock Joke

2006-11-11T19:31:00.000+05:30

I'm not very good at making knock knock jokes. I'm really bored right now that I actually got the motivation to make one. I thought I'd put it here, because I love boring the shit out of people.

Knock Knock!
Who's there?
[Sand nigger accent] Suicide bomber.
Suicide bomber wh...
KER-BOOOOM!!!

Technorati tags: Knock Knock, Joke, Lame, Humor, Humour

I Want a Laptop, ARGH!

2006-11-09T23:45:00.000+05:30

Politicians piss me off! Especially when they're upto something with a political gimmick. When it comes to political gimmicks, Indian politicians rank at the top. Take a look at what this politician is upto...

This picture pissed me off. Another political gimmick. This time, its Sharad Pawar, the agriculture minister, using Craig Barrett, the Intel chairman.

What the fuck is he doing gifting a laptops to rural people? What are they going to to with it? They don't even have stable power supply in the first place! Are they going to provide any special education for them, to use the laptops?

Before you write me off as a jealous prick, let me drill a little sense into your ignorant head (I can only hope your head isn't empty). Most people in the rural area don't even have proper education, let alone three square meals a day. If Craig wanted to play Philanthropist, he would have looked to provide these basic things first. The laptops, if they had been gifted to people who would actually make use of it, the political gimmick along with his marketing gimmick for WiMAX wireless, would have been overlooked. This is just one of those moves to make the rural people kiss Pawar's ass, because they've been pissed at him so far for doing very little in the Agricultural sector. What pissed me off even more is that the Intel chairman, even though would have seen through this gimmick, actually went ahead gifting precious and costly laptops to people who know nothing about it. ARGH! I need one of those laptops!

Technorati tags: Intel, Craig Barrett, Sharad Pawar, Politics, Laptops, Rants, India

Oops... She Did it Again!

2006-11-09T09:18:00.000+05:30

We don't call her a slut, whore, bitch etc. for nothing. Britney and stable marriage somehow don't go together. She files for a divorce citing "irreconcilable differences". Hmm. I'm pretty sure I read a few days ago, that she said K-Fed had been "really supportive" on her way from a fat cow to her old self. The real reason probably is that K-Fed denied to touch her when she was a fat bitch, and now she wants to go one up on him.

Too bad they had kids. I actually feel bad for Junior I and II. Not because their parents are getting divorced. Because their genes are made up of a dumb bitch and a half baked, idiot rapper. I wonder who Britney's next temporary husband would be. Any guesses? Would he last 55 hours or would Britney be attempting a new "shortest marriage" record? It all remains to be seen. Fun times ahead for shit talkers like me :D.

Britney Spears and K-Fed wondering if their baby can float in the ocean.

The couple, oblivious to the fact that Junior has floated away.

Technorati tags: Britney Spears, Kevin Federline, Britney, K-Fed, Entertainment, Gossip, Trash Talk, Marriage, Divorce

Idiots Cannot be 007

2006-11-07T23:49:00.000+05:30

Sean P. Diddy (I hope that's his name, 'cause he keeps on changing it every now and then) wants to be the next Bond. LOL. z0mg. ROFL. LMFAO. That's the funniest shit I've heard in a while. Can you imagine a rapping Bond, talking in ebonics? "Yo, mah name iz Bond... Jaymz Bond, nigga." People need to have realistic dreams.

And have you ever wondered what the "P" in his name stands for? Pee, of course. He also admitted, along with his Bond dreams, that he used to be a bed wetter. A rapping, bed wetting James Bond talking in ebonics. Oh yeah, thats the ultimate James Bond. Ever.

Technorati tags: Diddy, P. Diddy, Music, Entertainment, Movies, James Bond, Funny

Just for Saddam

2006-11-06T23:55:00.000+05:30

So, Saddam has been sentenced to death. I'd like to take this opportunity to dedicate a song for him, and the people in Iraq who are angry over the sentence. It's a song by the band Dope. It goes, "DIE MOTHERFUCKER DIE!"

Burn in hell, Saddam. I will meet you there in about 60 years.

Technorati tags: Saddam, Iraq, Saddam Hussein, Dope. Humor

Announcement

2006-11-06T23:53:00.000+05:30

I've made a few changes in the layout. Go have a look around if you feel like :D. One obvious change is the removal of ads (I have Violent Acres phobia now. I don't want to get bashed for running ads and providing shit content :-S).Go have a look around for other major and minor changes. I would have implemented all these changes way back, if not for my college work. I'm hard pressed for time (and so the irregular posting), but from now on, I'm going to delay the college work and concentrate more on the blog (inspiration from Cap). Give me feedback on the changes, and report bugs, if you see any. More changes coming soon.

Oh, and whoever can list ALL the changes gets a cookie ;)

Celebrity Halloween

2006-11-03T23:39:00.000+05:30

The great day came and went. Did you ever wonder how the celebrities would have celebrated Halloween? No? I didn't either. I couldn't care less. But then again, I haven't bashed celebrities for some time now. None of them have been upto anything silly. So I thought this would come as a good opportunity to make fun of them for no reason. I could make fun of them all, but then this post would go on for eternity. Here's what I imagined my top 5 hated celebrities would have been upto this Halloween.

Paris Hilton:

Need I say more? That costume is sure to knock the daylights (or nightlights) of Count Dracula. Imagine all the innocent people in Paris' neighborhood who had to give out candies to her.

Nicole Richie:

She doesn't need a costume to scare the shit out of her neighbors. Wearing no make up is enough. Look at what Lizze captured in her camera. The third one is totally hilarious, and justifies my point that this dangerously underweight, nepotistic socialite doesn't need make up to go around the neighborhood, frightening innocent people.

Britney Spears:

LOL! I'll leave the commenting on that costume to you.

50 Cent:

Imagine this throwaway rapper turned gangster goin' round da 'hood, poppin' hiz gun, rappin' and singin' Candy Shop. Trick-or-treating was never horrifying like that before.

Justin Timberlake:

Just when you thought it couldn't get worse than "Fitteay" Cent, enters a half bald headed, trying-to-act-black wigger, JT. The PG version of Eminem. I don't know about you, but I will not tolerate this gay man knocking on my door squeaking "Trick or treat!". You definitely don't want to hear the trick part, especially with your back against him. No picture included, because I don't post gay man pics on my blog. No sir.

Technorati tags: Halloween, Humor, Funny, Satire, Humour, Celebrities, Celebrity, Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie, Britney Spears, 50 Cent, Justin Timberlake is Gay

Halloween Scare

2006-11-01T23:35:00.000+05:30

Yesterday, something weird happened. I went to bed a little late - around 2 AM. Just when I was about to turn off the lights and do my pillow (pfffss, as if YOU don't do your pillow), I heard a strange noise. The noise that you hear when a heavy piece of furniture is dragged. It was faint though. At first, I thought a burglar had broken into our house, and had accidently stumbled on our furniture. Then I heard it again. Unless the burglar was a complete idiot, like Violent Acres, he wouldn't stumble on the furniture again. So it had to be something else...

I got out of my room and searched the house. Nothing. I didn't hear the sound the whole time I was searching. So, I go back to my room. And there it was again. I was beginning to think it was some kind of monster... out to take a bite out of humans, one its first victims being me. There went the sound again, but with a different tone to it this time. I gathered enough courage to open my window and peep out. I laughed my ass off when I heard a pattern emerging (*grunt*grrrruuunnnnt*pfffszz* *grunt*grrrruuunnnnt*pfffszz*). In our neighboring house, which is a fair distance away, the grandpa living there was snoring out loud! Geez. And I was expecting Count Dracula to pop out from the darkness.

Technorati tags: Halloween, Humor, Monsters, Vampires, Horror, Humour, Funny

Uhh... - Part II

2006-11-01T23:16:00.000+05:30

Thanks to Caps' research, I came to know about Sweetney, Amalah, Violent Acres and all the emotional crap involved with them. After doing some more research on "mommy blogs" (Yes, I did it without Caps' or anyone else's help), I saw most of these mommies post pictures of their little ones. You know, the so called "cute" pictures... the "cuteness" you'll understand only if you're a mommy yourself. Another thing I noticed is, these mommies usually have a domain of their own, and run ads to make a few quick bucks. Hey, I'm not the jealous type. I don't mind anyone spinning money off of their blog. But in this case, the content happens to be their precious, little blue (or black or brown) eyed angels. Which translates to the mommies being responsible for the content, as they are using their kids to entertain the internet "masses". And masses translate to different kinds of people - stupid ones, morons (like me), intelligent ones, pedophiles and, physically and emotionally abused orphans like the owner of "Violent Acres", whoever he/she might be.

Mind you, I'm NOT supporting the half baked psycho here. Although I think what the crazy bitch (probably from Houston, Texas) did with the kids' photos were moronic, the concerned mommy is also at fault, to an extent. Don't you think converting your children into a traffic bait in the hopes that it will make some money sounds creepy? Indeed it does.

Before you click "comment" and try to bash me, let me tell you that I'm not totally against people blogging about their kids. But if you are pimping out your kids' cuteness for a few quick bucks, it is a little unpalatable. If you really do want to do that, you'd be better off giving the URL to people you know, trust and care. All I want to say is, kids aren't commercial content. But if you are going to publicly display personal photos, chances are you WILL be attacked by an emotionally abused bastard, not necessarily from Houston, Texas.

Technorati tags: Sweetney, Amalah, Kids, Violent Acres, Crazy Bitch, Idiots, Morons, Half Baked Psycho

Uhh...

2006-10-31T22:47:00.000+05:30

I was browsing Technorati a bit, and found a lot of posts about "Amalah", "Sweetney" and "Violent Acres". I could figure out there was a relation between these "things" or "stuff" or whatever they are. I'm feeling real lazy today (the way I feel almost every other day), so I'm not really interested in doing a bit of research. Can anyone please explain what the hell it is about? I will give you a cookie if you do ;)

Technorati tags: What, the, hell, are, Sweetney, Amalah, and, Violent Acres ?

The Blue Billion S(t)inks

2006-10-29T23:35:00.000+05:30

The crunch match. The true test of character. The moment of truth. And the truth is, India was not upto it. India were comprehensively beaten in the virtual quarter-final of the Champions Trophy 2006 against Australia. The Blue Billion, instead of rising, sunk. And predictably, captain Rahul Dravid went, "I think we were 25-30 runs short in the end." That is what you say every single time! Think of another excuse for the upcoming series against South Africa and then the World Cup!

Seriously though, I think all the unnecessary hype is to blame, especially the one created by Pepsi. The Blue Billion hype was just too much. Morons who knew nothing about cricket joined in, semi-intelligent cricket fans started talking like experts, the expectations for the Indian team to win went soaring, the pressure got to them and they crumbled like a cookie.

For those of you who don't know about the Blue Billion hype, I'll explain it to you real quick. Pepsi roped in a few celebrities before this cricket tournament kicked off. There were stupid commercials on TV, where these celebs ask every Indian to cheer the team (The color of the Indian cricket team outfit = blue. Indian population = one billion. One billion people wearing the team color = support, and eventually "Blue Billion". Get it?). And they had this "One in a billion" competition where people (morons) were asked "What would be the craziest thing you'd do for the Indian team?" and they'd go "I'll keep doing the spinning dance till the team wins!", "I'll invite the whole team over to lunch!", "I'll wear a blue wig and Indian team colors and cheer for them! Gooooo team!!!!", "I make super spicy snacks. I'll give it to the team and they'll be charged up on the field!" etc. See, Pepsi knew there are plenty of semi-intelligent "fans" out there, and capitalized on that. Do these morons even know that Pepsi doesn't give a shit about Indian cricket? Do they even realize all this blue billion hype was created only to recover lost ground by the cola giant, because of the pesticide controversy? Why is there plenty of morons in the country? When will sanity prevail? So many questions, I don't think I'll have the answers any sooner.

But of course, in the end, the team had to perform. But didn't. Lost. Got knocked out of the tournament. As simple as that. It was one of the worst bowling performances I've ever seen. All the unnecessary hype over Munaf Patel being a great strike bowler got to him. Now look what happened. He gave away too many runs and bowled too many bad deliveries. Asking Pathan to be an all rounder already is too much, and it has taken its toll in his bowling. There are so many questions to be answered before the team leaves for the South African tour. What happened to the "superb batting form" of Yuvraj Singh all of a sudden? Suresh Raina looked like he was playing to retain his place in the team. He wasn't putting the bad deliveries to the boundary. All the hype over M.S Dhoni being a great hitter is bullshit. What happened to his "immense batting talent" today, when it was needed the most? Why couldn't Harbhajan Singh, the "greatest bowler in the Indian team" right now, deliver when it was needed? And R.P Singh, what the fuck was he doing in the team in the first place? All the so called "talent" and "form" popped like cherry and the whole team was fucked over in the tournament. I bet everyone in the team has made their money and are looking to retire early in life. Commercialization of sport must be stopped. Now. Or all the excitement in it will be lost.

Technorati tags: Champions Trophy, Cricket, Sports, Australia, India Bitching, Rants, Pepsi, Blue Billion, Stupid, Hype

Where is Austin Powers???

2006-10-28T23:44:00.000+05:30

... 'cause these MF's need to be stopped. Yeah baby, yeah!

Technorati tags: Osama bin Laden, bin Laden, Picture, Funny, Humor, Humour

Firefox 2.0

2006-10-27T23:49:00.000+05:30

Finally the wait is over. And I finally got the time to download the much awaited version of the browser. Looks neat. The only change I was able to notice immediately were the icons and a "close" button in every tab. The "go" button and the search area have had a makeover too. I have heard criticisms on Firefox 2.0's GUI, but it seems alright to me. It's actually better than the previous versions, in my opinion. The default theme is by far the best of all the Firefox versions.

I'm glad that the in-page search finally returns matches found in forms and text areas (or text boxes). Well, its about time! This was one area where Internet Explorer was owned Firefox. It was a big headache for me previously, when I had to find word(s) in the typing area of Blogger, to edit sentences. Finally, I can find the words easily.

In built spell checker! That is a great feature, though I don't make typos :P. In fact, I came to realize I'm a good and relatively fast typer when spell check didn't return me a lot of errors :D. Added to this, it also has identity theft protection. Plus an enhanced Web Feed support. If users don't want to save a live bookmark to their bookmarks folder, they can instead choose to save it to online services, such as Bloglines, My Yahoo!, or Google Reader, or with any desktop application.

The only thing that probably bothers Firefox addicts (like me) is the way tabbed browsing works. A close button has now been added to every tab, instead of just one on the top right. Also, it seems Firefox uses lesser memory now. Atleast that is how it appeared to me. The default theme did guzzle up a bit more memory than the one in the previous version, but the Mostly Crystal theme took a lot less memory than it did in the previous version. Overall, Firefox 2.0 owns every other browser out there!

Technorati tags: Firefox, Mozilla, Browser, Internet, Tech, Review

Awesome Idea

2006-10-24T23:28:00.000+05:30

I've got a great idea that might solve the cross-border terrorism of Pakistan forever. There are one billion of us in the country, see? We all piss in the direction of Pakistan at the same time, see? That would flood Pakistan and drown them towelheads for good.

After that, we target China ;). Fucking slant eyed communist midgets.

Technorati tags: Pakistan, Terrorism, Islam, Towelheads, China, Communist, Humor, Humour, Idea

Internet Explorer 7

2006-10-23T23:49:00.000+05:30

Finally, its here. I tried the latest version of Inturdnet Expl... I mean, Internet Explorer. Looks okay. The biggest change, in my opinion, is the user interface. It didn't load broken pages like the beta (yet...). And security wise, it is a big step forward from the previous versions, I think. The much talked about ActiveX handling by IE has changed dramatically. Still, I wouldn't say it cannot be exploited with scriptlets. IE 7 still doesn't have perfect standards support, but it is much better than previous versions of the browser.

I'm glad it supports CSS and JavaScript better than the previous versions. That means I probably won't be getting pissed off (often, atleast) when my Blogger template looks fucked up in IE. It has got a RSS feed discovery, quick zoom, custom search settings for integrated search bar... almost every feature its competitor browsers already have. This should have lessened the gap between IE and its competitors, but it still has a long way to go to catch up, one feels. I even heard IE is taking the Firefox path, supporting add-ons made by third party developers (ieaddons.com). Hmm, this is going to be interesting.

Technorati tags: Internet Explorer 7, IE7, Internet Explorer, Internet, Browsers, Microsoft, News, Review

Stop Bullying Rockstar Games!

2006-10-23T23:13:00.001+05:30

What do all Rockstar produced games have in common, other than sex and violence? You guessed it, controversy. Early this week, Rockstar games released a game, Bully, and controversy has arised even before it has hit the United States. Some moron lawyer (Jack Thompson) from Florida filed a case, wanting the game to be banned. The funny this is, he hasn't even played a bit of the game, but claims that it could lead to student violence. Uh huh. Sounds like an out-of-job lawyer, looking to earn some easy money by suing people. The bastard.

"The premise of Bully is that it is sometimes acceptable to deal with bullying by becoming the ultimate bully," Thompson wrote in his complaint. "This was the dynamic at Columbine. It has been the dynamic in other tragic instances of school violence."

However, sanity prevailed and the judge gave Jack Thompson the middle finger. After he watched someone play it, Florida Judge Ronald Friedman concluded: "There's a lot of violence. A whole lot. (But) less than we see on television every night." Tough luck, Jack Thompson. You gotta wait till Rockstar releases the next game in the Grand Theft Auto series to try your luck again.

Technorati tags: Bully, RockStar, Rockstar Games, Jack Thompson, Moron, Stupid, Video Games, Gaming

Porn Star for Governor!

2006-10-23T23:02:00.000+05:30

Recently I came to know that a famous porn star, Mary Carey is running for Governor of California. This chick has acted in movies titled "Boobsville Sorority Girls", "Cheerleader School etc. LMFAO! Claims the wannabe Governor turned porn star, "More people know that I am running for governor than (know of) Arnold (Schwarzenegger)'s Democratic challenger. Our polling results have shown my name to be more recognizable than any other candidate in the race." Indeed. You're a porn star!

And I thought our politics was fucked up...

Technorati tags: Porn Star, Mary Carey, Pornstar, Governor, Politics, California, ROFL, WTF?

One for Paris Hilton

2006-10-21T23:51:00.000+05:30

It's been a while since I bashed the heiress, Paris Hilton. She hasn't been upto anything stupid recently (looks like she came across my blog, saw my bashing and committed suicide?). So here's one to Paris. I was searching for her pics, hoping to run into some funny result. I did. Look what I found.

Oops, she spelt "YOU'RE" wrong!

Technorati tags: Paris Hilton, Celebrity, Pic, Funny, Humor, Humour, ROFL, LMAO

Humor in Depression

2006-10-20T23:24:00.000+05:30

I have a mild bipolar disorder (...I think), so I was like "I can't do anything right. I always fuck things up. I'm good for nothing..." all to myself. Then suddenly, my humorous side quipped, "Maybe I should consider becoming a politician!"

Technorati tags: Humor, Funny, Life, ROFL, Humour

What the Fuck, President?

2006-10-19T23:25:00.000+05:30

The terrorist I was talking about a few days back is supposed to be hanged tomorrow morning. But as the stupid laws have it, you can't hang a prisoner if he files a "mercy plea" to the President, and the President hasn't done anything about it. Where the fuck did that piece of "law" come from? And though it might be justified in rare cases, how the fuck does it apply to a fucking terrorist? Who attacked the Parliament even.

While completely ignoring this important matter, our President is happily going around Assam, meeting moronic self help group workers. I wonder if he even went through this "mercy plea" that was filed. Is he deliberately delaying the terrorist's death because our President is a muslim too? Is he afraid he'd be a target in the terrorists' hit list if he declined the plea? Does he even know that someone has filed a plea, and he has to look it up?

"Kashmiri leaders have said the execution would fuel a Muslim separatist revolt in the Himalayan region that has killed more than 45,000 people since 1989", cries out loud, Reuters India. Hmm. That's about 2600 people a year. But they never said what killed them. It must be the nut freezing cold more than anything else. Bastard leaders and their misleading stats. If you don't have the balls to execute a terrorist because you're afraid it might cause revolts and protests, then you aren't good enough to lead the country. Go lie down on your momma's lap so she can spank you. Morons.

Technorati tags: Terrorist, Terrorism, Islam, India, Rant, Politics, Current Affairs, Abdul Kalam, is, a, Moron

Aussies Kicked in the Balls

2006-10-18T23:47:00.000+05:30

Which is exactly what I wanted, and I knew it would happen because their record in the sub continent isn't the greatest. Good job, West Indies. This throws the contest wide open.

And I'd like to take this moment to show my middle finger to all Islamic extremists. Just random anger. That's all for tonight. Now go back to whatever you were doing.

Technorati tags: Extremist, Islam, Motherfuckers, Should, be, Shot, in, the, Balls, Cricket, Australia, West Indies, Champions Trophy

One For the Emos

2006-10-17T21:47:00.000+05:30

Technorati tags: Emo, Joke, Humor, Humour, Funny

Champions Trophy Kicks Off With Controversy.

2006-10-17T19:47:00.000+05:30

It was a bit unusual though, during the qualifiers, there wasn't much of bullshit other than two relatively stronger teams having to play against minnows, Zimbabwe and Bangladesh, to qualify for the main round. So, Shoaib Akthar and Mohammed Asif of Pakistan fail the dope test and are sent back home. Pakistan are always known for unfair play, though Shoaib Akthar claims he is innocent. Yeah right. Him using drugs in all other matches he has played so far is debatable, because of his consistent 150+ kmph bowling.

Though I said West Indies needing to qualify against minnows was bullshit, it is also justifiable to an extent, with their roller coaster form. One day they're wiped out for 80, the next they'd go on to beat a world class team. Such is the inconsistency this team has fallen into, and that adds a bit of an excitement to this contest, in my opinion.

And the pitches aren't the usual flat batsman's paradise that you'd usually find in India. Finally, some respite for the bowlers, who have always come under fire for "not bowling well" on flat tracks. This would test the real skills of a batsman, especially the overrated Virender Sehwag, Kevin Pietersen and other big hitters. The spectator turn out seems to be good too, compared to the previous events.

What sucks though is the pre-match show, hosted by a dumb bitch who is only good enough to show cleavage and not talk cricket. All the "movie stars" are cashing in on this big event as a forum to promote themselves and their dumbass movies during the pre-match show. The cricket experts are hardly given a chance to talk, with the dumb bitch and the homosexual looking co-host ramble on for eternity about unrelated stuff to the match in question.

That pretty much covers everything, for now. Australia seem the favorites, with a never-say-die attitude that they've always had. But again, their record in India isn't the greatest. So it won't be a walk in the park for them. Pakistan, West Indies and England can be probably ruled out because of their recent poor form and lack of match winners. South Africa and New Zealand would fancy their chances, while the latter beat the former comprehensively, defending a less than moderate total of 191. Sri Lanka have been in tremendous form for the past two months, though one can argue they have beaten lesser teams and a watered down English side. And finally, the big one. India (ooh ahh India!). I wouldn't say they're hot favorites. They have a fair chance, because the points between the number two side South Africa and number six Sri Lanka, is very marginal. Any side ranked number two to six can beat another any day. But what I'd like to see is less commercialization of the sport in the country. Every inconsiderate moron in the country seems to be "true cricket fan", with their "Ooh ah India!..." chant. Besides this bullshit and the pre-match show, this cricketing event seems to be better than the previous versions.

P.S: Comment to let me know about your views, and your pick on who'd win this cricketing event.

Technorati tags: Cricket, Sports, Champions Trophy, ICC, Bimbo, India, Australia, Pakistan, New Zealand, South Africa, Sri Lanka, England, West Indies

I'm Feeling Lucky

2006-10-13T22:32:00.000+05:30

Technorati tags: Google, Pic, Picture, Body, Beauty, Sexy, Hot, Chick, Humor, Humour, Funny

Umm... Err... Ah... So uh....

2006-10-12T23:49:00.000+05:30

Warning: This is a personal post, so if you're not into reading others personal stuff, don't continue.

It's not often you come across a personal post in my blog. But this event, I had to post. It was a typical boring day yesterday, I was sitting at my computer, browsing and listening to music. It was a while since I went online on Yahoo! so I decided to go online and hoped to run into my pals. One of my best buddies was online, and we chatted for a while. The convo changed to the usual "who have you got the hots for" and the like. I told her one of her friend was hot. She is my friend too. More like an aquaintance. Anyway, my buddy already knew I had the hots for her friend, but I told her again anyway.

Then the convo took many twists and turns, blah blah blah and then suddenly, out of nowhere, my buddy went "I'm persuading <hot chick> to call you!" I was like "OMGWTF?!" on the inside, but I told her my phone was downstairs, charging. It was the truth, in fact. She told me to go get it, and that she had to go offline. You should have seen my face then. I had the "Oh no! A hot chick is going to call me, what am I going to say?" look on my face. I'm not much of a conversationalist. I only talk when necessary. So it was only natural I had that look on my face. I switched off my computer, went downstairs because I was sleepy. It was only 7:45 pm. I hadn't slept the day before, and the day before that, I had to go out to the city with my dad. Long story. So I dozed off in a few seconds, had a weird dream and woke up 40 minutes later. My phone was flashing, so I checked it. It had two missed calls, from an unknown number. I was almost sure it was <hot chick>. I don't get a lot of calls, so its not too difficult to guess. And this is where the adventure (or misadventure) started.

I decided to call back the number, but I couldn't get my thumb to press the "call" button. I was really worried that I might run out of things to talk after the "how are you" and "whats up?" exchanges. Strange things were going through my head. I heard some voices in my head. I was trying hard to think of topics to talk about, but in vain. My heart started beating fast, and by this time, my testicles had gone so far up my stomach, they had become ovaries. I wanted to call her back badly, because I didn't want to look like an asshole who doesn't return calls. My thumb was still being adamant about not pressing the "call" button. So I used my index finger instead. Suddenly I felt a surge of confidence, and all the voices in my head disappeared. *beeeep.....* *beeeep.....* The phone was engaged. I took a deep sigh and tried again after two minutes. I decided not to try anymore if it was engaged again. *Tring Tring* *Tring Tring*!

All the recently gained confidence went *pop* and the voices in my head were back. "Holy crap! What do I do now???" I thought. A chick answered. By this time, I knew it was her, but I tried not to sound excited. I went "Uhh, yeah... I got a couple of missed calls from this number. Err... May I know who I'm talking to?". She went, "Slim?" and I'm like "Yeah, and who's this?". I already knew the answer, but I asked anyway. She replied, "It's me, <hot chick>!" and I go "Oh hey! <hot chick>! How are ya? How'd ya get my number?" blah blah blah. Notice the accent I used to sound cool. The call didn't last too long though. Exactly after 1 minute and 34 seconds, she was like "Okay, uhh... I gotta studdy now so..." and I automatically went "Ah awright, I'll talk to ya later. Bye!" *click*

The whole night I was wondering what I did wrong. Was I too formal? Was I too shy and didn't talk well? I was breaking my head, and the voices in my head called me a wimp. I was feeling down, but I tried not to think too much about it, but in vain. Almost 24 hours after the "adventure", my best buddy texts me and asks how it went with her friend. I didn't want to say the whole thing over a text message, so I said I had a lot to talk about it and asked her to go online on Yahoo! She replied she can't make it online because she had stuff to do, and I was amazed by the next sentence of the text message. It said "<hot chick> told me she got a little nervous". Nervous! And to think I thought I was the nervous person! You don't know how much happy this little sentence made me. Ah, life is weird and humorous in every way possible.

Technorati tags: Personal, Blogging, Life, Funny, Comedy, LOL, ROFL

Jesus Loves a Knock Knock Joke

2006-10-10T23:13:00.000+05:30

Technorati tags: Humor, Funny, Picture, Humour, Pic, Jesus, Christ, Joke, LMAO, ROFL

Of All the Moronic Things...

2006-10-09T23:38:00.000+05:30

Nu-Metal. Fashion shows. Body suspension. The chicken dance. Dropping the soap in the shower. Throughout history, the most idiotic of humans have invented dumbass activities to entertain themselves. But this one has to be the most moronic of them all. Ghostriding, the new ghetto white-boy craze.

This activity, made popular by the suburban chavs who smoke too much pot, consists of getting OUT of a car while its moving, and posing on the hood, surfing on the roof and sitting on the trunk, usually while one of their idiot "homies" tapes it in a camera. Sometimes they dance alongside the car while its rolling. I hope they get their foot run over.

Here are a couple of videos of morons ghostriding:

Video #1

This guy was riding way too fast to be attempting this. I was hoping the truck would run him over after he jumped off.

Video #2

I hope this video was real. I'd love to see a video of him calling the insurance company.

Unemployed + Too much crack = Ghostriding. A friendly advice: Don't try this at home, folks.

Technorati tags: Morons, Idiots, Stupid, Video, Videos, Youtube, Pwned, Owned, Douchebags, Chavs, Ghostriding

A Joke

2006-10-07T23:41:00.000+05:30

Yo there, my precious readers. I couldn't get the time to post today too, so here is a quick joke for y'all. (Frequent posting will start in a week, so hang on)

Q: If a blonde and an emo kid jump off a building and hit the ground at the same time, who dies first?

A: The blonde, she drowns in the emo kid's tears.

Technorati tags: Humor, Humour, Funny, Joke, Emo, LMAO, ROFL

Kill the Terrorist

2006-10-06T22:12:00.000+05:30

Its been a long 5 years since the terrorist attack on the Indian Parliament. And they finally nab one of the bastards. Just one. And guess what? He happens to be a muslim. "Not surprising, 'cause 96.257% of terrorists in the world happen to be Muslims", a researcher, who doesn't want to be identified for fear of getting attacked, tells me (pssst, the researcher is my alter ego. Don't tell anyone, aight?). But what would be surprising is if the Government (yes, the lame Indian Government) accepts the "plea" from him and his towel headed family. What plea? A plea to reconsider his death sentence, what else? I was like "WHAT THE FUCK, CHUCK?!?!" when I caught up on the news online today. Also, I learnt some fucking politician is backing the plea.

"He still does not want to move a mercy petition seeking clemency. He said he has lost faith in the system." said the terrorists' wife (don't know if she's his third or fourth or even seventeenth though). "Lost faith in the system"... LOL! The ways these towelheads try to get out of the frying pan. The fire even. What I can't digest is the fact that the moronic Human Rights Organizations are supporting his cause.

Fuck it. Fuck terrorists, fuck politicians, fuck the Government, fuck the HRO and fuck you . Its ME who has lost faith in the so called "System".

Technorati tags: Terrorist, Terrorism, Terrorists, Islam, Terrorist Bastard, Muslim, Politics, Fuck, Indian Government, India, Towelhead

This Politician Takes the Cake

2006-10-03T22:48:00.000+05:30

And probably the icing too. If you think a politician promising the whole State free Telivisions if elected is weird, wait till you hear what a politician from the opposition promised if the party gets elected in the local body elections... Free car for everyone. Yes, you read it right. Car.

What's funnier, no one other than me and my dad seem to be ridiculing this crazy politician. Not even the media (so I really can't cite a source. But you can believe whatever shit I put here, they're all genuine). Looks like we're the only two sane people left in the State. Or it's us who need a reality check...

Oh snap, might as well try and vote the crazy bastards into power and demand the free car.

Technorati tags: Politics, Politicians, Humor, Funny, Comedy, Humour, Crazy, Wacko, WTF

An Elephant...

2006-10-02T19:55:00.000+05:30

... saw a naked man and blurted out, "How do you EAT with that thing?!?!"

Technorati tags: Humor, Funny, Humour, Joke, Silly

eXlinks

2006-09-30T23:28:00.000+05:30

eXlinks is supposedly an exponential link growing site. It is supposed to increase incoming links, boost pagerank and traffic massively. In short, eXlinks is going to kick some major ass! Follow the link above, or the one here to go to their page and sign up. Signing up now gives some extra benifit after the site goes live, says the eXlinks sign up page.

How does this work? They haven't revealed it yet, and won't, until the site is launched officially. But paranoid nuts who care about site traffic (like me) can go there and sign up now and invite a few friends to beat the rush.

P.S: This blog will probably be hibernating this whole week, or there will be some random posts. Regular readers, pardon.

Technorati tags: Tech, Internet, Web, Link Swap, Traffic, Blogging

Microsoft's Middle Finger to Open Source

2006-09-28T22:32:00.000+05:30

In a new move, Microsoft has decided to incorporate a new feature in the yet to be released Windows Vista, which would stop running Open Source or any other non-Microsoft product. If the user(s) want(s) to run them, Vista would cost an additional $ 95. "This new decision has been taken to keep the competition out of the way," said Billy Gates. "It would also help me cover my recent deficits" he added.

When asked what Microsoft would do if people started moving towards alternative Operating Systems, the Chairman replied, "Heh. Our cool new interface would keep the suckers glued to our product. We're roping in a famous model-actress to promote Vista."

With the already seperated features such as Windows Aero, Integrated Search, Sidebar, Windows Mail, Windows Calendar, Photo Gallery, DVD maker, Media Player 11, Media centre features and loads of hoardes of other features, the Windows Vista Ultimate Edition would cost around $ 500. Looks like Billy will cross the $ 100 billion mark very soon.

Technorati tags: Microsoft, Windows, software, Computers, Bill Gates, Gates, Satire, Humor, Fun, Humour

Jesus' Short Water Polo Career

2006-09-26T23:18:00.001+05:30

Technorati tags: Jesus, Christ, God, Water Polo, Sports, Humor, Funny, Humour

Bluto Demoted

2006-09-25T21:05:00.000+05:30

Almost a month after planet Pluto's demotion, Bluto - popular villian and arch enemy of Popeye the sailor man (toot, toot) gets the axe. Bluto has been officially demoted to Blutoid status, which contains other has-been villains such as Yellow Pinky, Goldflipper the walrus, Dr.O the opossum and Morocco Mole's evil twin of Secret Squirrel fame, Mandark from Dexter's Laboratory and - in a move that surprised many - Dick Dastardly and Muttley of Wacky Races fame.

Bluto was reportedly disappointed by this decision from the panel of experts which chose to demote his status, "This is a real blow for genuine bad guys. I'm being axed for doing my job. Meanwhile, Popeye is setting a bad example by continually smoking the pipe."

Popeye, on the other hand, seemed rather amused by the apparent demise of his rival, "Ug! Ug! Ug! Ug! Now I gotz Olive all to meself!"

He was last seen heading toward Ms.Oyl's bedroom with a tin of spinach.

Technorati tags: Satire, Humor, Stupid, Funny, Humour, Comedy, Cartoons

Announcement

2006-09-25T19:45:00.000+05:30

The Slim's Wacky Blog!™ Board of Directors (me and my alter ego) have decided to include 'Satire' as one of the many subjects this blog covers. A new category, satire has been created so you, the precious reader, can keep track of posts under that category.

Alright, enough foolin' around. Keep'a lookin' for some good stuff in the near future.

Bin Laden Dead?

2006-09-24T19:39:00.000+05:30

Today's newspaper headline screamed those exact words. For a change, this news of death made me go . "Ah, the towelhead is finally dead!", I thought. Reading on, I came to know this was not the first time his death was reported. I became a little sceptic then about the news. Then it went on to report that this news was leaked from the French intelligence. The French, bah. Now I had a real reason to be sceptic about the whole thing. He's probably hiding in Pakistan, in President Perverse... err... I mean Pervez Musharraf's basement with his four tootsie (read: whore) wives.

Tomorrow, we'll probably see Bin Laden releasing a video tape dismissing the French intelligence reports and mocking them (who doesn't mock the French?). He'd probably go, "I almost did die... My terrorist friends threw me a party, and I got drunk as fuck... and almost had my 119th child with this hot Arabian chick!".

Technorati tags: Bin Laden, Al Qaeda, Osama, Osama bin Laden, Terrorism, Terrorist, French, News, France

Funny Pic

2006-09-23T21:29:00.000+05:30

Technorati tags: Pluto, Planets, Science, Funny, Humor, Humour, Pic, Picture

Sending EXE Files in Gmail

2006-09-21T23:20:00.000+05:30

A lot of you probably have Gmail as your primary email account, and it frustrates you that you have to use another email service when attaching executable (exe) files in your mail. Though Gmail does it for "security reasons", it is no excuse since they have an anonymous virus scanner (they haven't named which AV they're using) to scan attachments. But now, there is a solution to send executable attachments in Gmail! I accidently stumbled across this idea, and it takes you, the sender, and the recepient to do a little trick before you can send and recieve EXE's. Read on to find out how I stumbled across this idea, and how you can send EXE's!

So, this is how I stumbled across this idea. I was trying to embed a swf (flash) file on my MySpace that would play music. But MySpace, as arrogant as it is, started blocking the file and displayed the actual source code instead. I tried removing the .swf extension, uploading the file to a host and embedding it. Worked like magic! And suddenly I had an idea. Yep, you guessed it, an idea for sending EXE files with Gmail.

Firstly, you have to go to your Control Panel and look for "Folder Options". This can alternatively be accessed from the "My Computer" or Windows Explorer (NOT Internet Explorer!) "tools" menu. After the menu pops up, click on the "View" tab. Look for the option "Hide extensions for known file types" (highlighted in blue in the picture) and unckeck it. Click Apply, and then OK. Now, you will see the extension ".exe" in every executable file on your PC.

Now, the neat trick I was talking about. Rename the executable you want to attach in Gmail to ".jpg". For eg. if the file you want to send is "Blindows.exe", rename it to "Blindows.jpg". If the executable is large, you can Zip it. But remember to do this neat trick before zipping it.

Your recepient has to do the next part of this neat trick. Ask him/her/it to download the recieved file, do the renaming trick on his/her/its PC. For eg. ask him/her/it to rename the recieved file back to "Blindows.jpg" to "Blindows.exe". Now, attach the file and wear an evil smile on your face because you've fooled Gmail into attaching an executable file.

Note: This trick can be done on any email service that does not support certain file types. Just do the renaming trick to change the extension to a supported file type.

Warning: Be sure to scan executable files you recieve with a trusted Anti-Virus software. You never know when a script kiddie would misuse this neat trick.

Technorati tags: Gmail, Email, Google, Trick, Tips, tips-tricks, Tips & Tricks, Technical

The Simpsons - Indian Version

2006-09-20T23:52:00.000+05:30

Technorati tags: The Simpsons, TV, Entertainment, Television, Bart, Simpsons, Homer, Comedy, Funny, Humor, Humour, LMFAO

eBay Selling Tiger Poo

2006-09-19T23:25:00.000+05:30

You heard it right, folks. A years supply of tiger poo went on auction on eBay. And wouldn't you know, someone actually bought it. For £ 241. Now before you conclude the world has gone nuts (like I did, and well, it is nuts but that is a different story altogether), tiger poo actually keeps domestic moggies (whatever that is?) and foxes away from your garden, when "strategically placed". That's what the auction description says. I never knew foxes prowled domestic gardens though. Hmm.

The Chessington World of Adventures auctioned a years supply of dungs of Sumatran tigers Batu (the big fella in picture) and Ratna. They even described the poop as "the new 'black gold’ in the gardening world".

I wonder if human pee has a market. There's gotta be! Just think of all those random drug tests. eBay, here I come!

Technorati tags: eBay, Online Auction, Auction, Marketing, Tiger, Poo, Poop, Indonesia, Funny, Weird, WTF, LOL, OMGWTF

If Jesus Knew Chat Lingo...

2006-09-18T23:23:00.000+05:30

Technorati tags: Jesus, Christ, Picture, Pic, Funny, Humor, Humour, Joke, Comedy