Have you ever been called an asshole and you wondered in what context the person meant it? Check out the list below, and if one of them applies to you, you are an asshole!!


  • If you kidnap strangers, torture them and then decapitate them all in the name of Allah or any other religion, not only are you a fucking hypocrite... you are an asshole!
  • If you make fun of a sports team for 10 years and then when they suddenly do well you jump on the bandwagon and act as if you've always been a fan... you are an asshole!
  • If you get paid insane amounts of money to play a game and then beat up your fans for throwing something at you when you suck... you are an asshole!
  • If you make plans with your friend or date and then don't show up or even call... you are an asshole!
  • If you jerk off all over your friends' porno magazine and then give it back with the pages stuck together... you are an asshole!
  • If you take up two parking spaces for one car... you are an asshole! (unless you have to get your wheelchair out of your car)
  • If you park in a handicapped space and you are not handicapped... you are an asshole!
  • If you suddenly stop in the middle of a busy aisle/intersection/hallway and just stand there... you are an asshole!
  • If you complain about the government, yet don't vote... you are an asshole!
  • If you believe everything your government tells you... you are an asshole!
  • If you make decisions when you don't know shit about a subject... you are an asshole!
  • If you refuse to wait your turn and instead cut into line at every opportunity... you are an asshole!
  • If you are a racist... you are an asshole!
  • If you advocate censorship... you are an asshole!
  • If you fart noisily and then laugh while pointing at your buddies... you are an asshole!
  • If you ask stupid questions and then get pissed off when returned with stupid answers... you are an asshole!
  • If you brag about how good your girlfriend is in bed and then get mad when your friends take her for a test spin... you are an asshole!
  • If you get good service in a restaurant and yet don't tip... you are an asshole!
  • If your dick turns twenty different shades and is dripping thick fluids and you go out and fuck all the women you can just to pass it on... you are an asshole!
  • If you complain about your weight problem and still eat at McDonalds... you are an asshole!
  • If you call for a pizza, tell the guy to hold, then ask what everybody wants... you are an asshole!
  • If you put your makeup on while driving... you are an asshole!
  • If you don't bother to update the links to your own homepage... you are an asshole!
  • If you piss all over the toilet seat in a public restroom and don't have the common courtesy to wipe it off... you are an asshole!
  • If you bitch about your parents not buying you a new Playstation II when only 3 months ago they bought you a Gamecube... you are an asshole!
  • If you wear a team jersey and know nothing about the team or sport... you are an asshole!
  • If you trick others into drinking diarrhea mixed with milk by telling them it is chocolate milk... you are an asshole!
  • If you make a list of what constitutes an asshole... you are an asshole!



More definitions of asshole at TheDipstop.com